And that’s how we got bubbles in beer.
I’m glad someone else remembers that movie.
When I was a kid, I was legitimately afraid of this
That’s a 4D knife.
Then he went on to make lemonade with strawberries and heavy water. Deuterium, you get me? Strawberry fusion lemonade.
Is that what killed that girl at Panera a while back?
No I don’t get it. But I would like to. Is this one of those scenarios where three physicists walk into a bar, each one tells a joke but none of it are funny so no one gets it?
The moment I wrote it, I was hearing it in the voice of Benny Safdie in his first scene as weirdo Edward Teller, in “Oppenheimer”.
Didn’t watch the movie, probably why it went over my head. Sorry 🤷♂️
No Oppenheimer?!!
Your geek credentials are hereby revoked until further notice!
Or until you atone!
We’re gonna need a community for comedy homicide for this. That last panel ruins it.
Hawking, my guy, why have you forsaken us? 🥺 I believed in you
No, that knife isn’t made of atoms, that knife is made of pure solid quarks. That’s why it can cut atomic nuclei.
I choose to believe it’s made of small atoms, the kind you get from firing a shrink ray at something.
How big was that knife originally?!
They call me Johnny Smallatoms
One of these nerds is not like the others,
One of these geeks just doesn’t belong,
Can you tell which nerd is not like the others
By the time I finish my song?Tyson? Why not cause he’s an asshole? Are you aware that both Einstein and Hawkings were also assholes?
While Einstein and Hawking (no s) were giants of their field, published papers that turned all other accepted science on its head, and have basic physical phenomenon of the Universe named after them, they were surprisingly limited in their knowledge of other fields. Whereas NdT will expound on absolutely any topic with the complete certainty that he is a fucking expert, even if he only just now inferred the existence of the thing from the question he is presently being asked. He is a Mycroftian megabrain of galactic proportions, a fact he appreciates better than anyone else.
Anyway I think the meme should be updated with Newton, since that follows the theme of “groundbreaking and famous physicists”.
But they weren’t pretentious know-it-alls on TV and YT
I can imagine Twitter and YouTube in their day. Cancelled so fast lol
I don’t like Tyson because I feel he preaches an inaccurate version of the scientific philosophy. So many times I hear him saying things along the lines of absolute certainty, because it’s SCIENCE.
Where, we of the true faith, preach: the evidence indicates that this is the most likely to be true, or at least, this model makes predictions about the world more reliably than any other we currently have.
Amen.
Knives are also made of atoms
Sure? How many? Because I have some atoms at home and need a new knife
At least 50
Boy, that’s alot!
but an alot of atoms is just a regular old alot…!
Call that a knife?
Atomception
Not this knife
Some are smaller than others
Don’t eat fissile cucumbers.
deleted by creator
And that’s why you don’t see cooking mouse no more.
reminds me of yahoo serious splitting a beer atom with a chisel in his shed. young einstein, what a fun movie
That’s easy to explain, having cut a lot of cucumbers in my life. Since the actual nucleus of an atom is much smaller than the atom including its electrons itself, the probability of hitting the protons or neutrons is so small, that I’d need to live for a few thousand years and cut 1 cucumber per second nonstop, before this scenario happens even once. It is not impossible, just very improbable.
I know very little about physics and I’m pretty sure you could cut cucumbers with a knife until the end of time and you’ll never trigger a nuclear explosion.
Actually, it’s because cucumbers are so cool (c.f. cool as a cucumber) that they’re in a ground state. It’s actually endothermic to split their atoms so you don’t get a chain reaction.
Cutting hot vegetables, habernaros for example, is much more risky and adequate precautions should always be taken to avoid radioactivity contaminating sensitive regions of the body.
I thought the only option with cucumbers is to keep mashing them together until fusion, no?
(assuming your post isn’t a joke) it is impossible to cause a nuclear reaction by cutting cucumbers.
the biggest innacuracy in this comic is that as the panel zooms in on the cucumber atoms, the knife looks exactly the same. if it was realistic it would just be a bunch of metal atoms pushing aside a bunch of cucumber atoms, not a sharp knife slicing through individual atoms.
Well… that, and one nucleus splitting in half wouldn‘t start a chain reaction in a cucumber, and therefore not release a macroscopically noticeable amount of energy.
Bro, you should sharpen your knives.
Won’t this cause nicks and dulling as sudden heating and impact lead to both knives becoming extremely useless ?
Also replacing one of the knives with a sharpening rod, I can sort of suspend disbelief enough to believe it “possible”.
Maybe it’s not zooming in. Maybe the atoms of the cucumber are getting bigger! 😏
Fission doesn’t happen because we cut atoms in half. Fission happens because we blast enriched uranium with neutrons, the uranium absorbs a neutron, gets too heavy, and falls apart.
I mean think about it. Atoms are surrounded by a negatively charged electron cloud. Pushing 2 atoms together would be (sorta) like trying to push the like poles of two magnets together.
That’s just one way to do it.
Sure, but you can also rip off electrons from atoms by rubbing them or bending a piece of wire. The energy needed to trigger fission in uranium is less than a picojoule, it just needs to be focused enough to knock away the part of the atom, which is why neutrons are the most common way.
Here is a chart with the rate of fusion for two hydrogen atoms at various temperatures.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nuclear_fusion#/media/File%3AFusion_rxnrate.svg
This chart bottoms out at a few million degrees, since the probability is extremely low.
But what would you do with the sliced cucumbers of millenia?
Dunno. I guess growing them fast enough would also be a problem.
It’s also why cats are afraid of cucumbers.
Ok if it is theoretically possible to cut atoms by using metal knives then why didn’t ever a fission happen? I mean if you combine all knife cutting in the whole world since knives exist, the probability should be pretty high.
Well, it probably happened an infinite amount of times already. But the resulting cucumber-detonation just triggers a new Big Bang. We’re on the whatever-millionth reset now. Should end any day now. STOP CUTTING CUCUMBERS, SHEEPLE!!
Hmm this made me wonder why something like this wouldn’t melt the rock and then sink into the crust and then into the planet. Probably not hot enough.
And that made me think if we could build something like a big pellet of fissile material, encase it in tungsten or something so that it is hot enough to do so but remains stable, and then let it sink into the earth. Maybe that could be tracked? Then we could learn something about how it moves and where it ends up. But probably can’t be tracked since this isn’t star trek 🖖Well fission of uranium isn’t hard. I want you to see to fission a C atom! XD
Someone let Einstein loose, we must admit that violence is on occasion the only recourse.
You’re assuming the blade would be thinner than the nucleus, at the very least.
You’re doing it wrong. The mouse just diced a cucumber really, really l, small.
Okay, now explain bananas.
Well, that’s why we generally eat bananas without cutting. As everyone knows, bananas are slightly radioactive. This increases the danger when cutting them exponentially, so don’t do that.
What about your teeth?
What do your teeth look like, man?
Some are quite sharp. Won’t they cause a fission? Should I just munch on the banana instead?
Not with that attitude.
