I’ve got a 3 week-old newborn. During the day there are plenty of adorable moments and easy times. But it’s the middle of the fucking night, he strategically waited until I was switching diapers to piss on me and all over, then was flailing his arms and pushing the bottle out of his mouth even though he was very hungry, then shit his GODDAMN BRAINS OUT while eating, then after I burped him and cleaned him up and got him in new clothes and swaddled and put him down, he fucking screamed until I picked him up again.

Like, I’ve given him everything his tiny little brain and body could need. That coupled with the strategic shitting and pissing to require the absolute maximum amount of work from me.

The vent here, I guess, is that I fucking hate this. I loved my life with my wife and now we have next to zero intimacy(not sex, obviously, but even our normal physical touch). We have zero time for each other, one is tending the baby, while the other is desperately trying to keep up with cleaning bottles and keeping the house passably clean and there is no time for anything.

I would never let any of what I just said affect how I interact with the baby, but I’m fucking sick of having literally zero independence and I miss my wife (her being in the same bed and next to me most of the day makes it worse somehow).

Fuck.

Thank you for coming to my Ted talk. Check out The Oatmeal, they’ve got a comic about having kids that’s painfully applicable.

  • @Railing5132English
    2•5 months ago

    There are wipe warmers that are pretty cheap, with varying quality. My spouse has them all over the house.

    As others have said, he’s not being intentional about anything even though it sure feels like it. I swear my little one waits to hear the rustling of the sheets of me getting into bed after putting her in the crib to go all “car alarm” on us.

    Your frustration and sleep deprivation is real. Communicate with your partner. Make sure you’re both helping each other as much as possible and giving grace to each other. If you ever sense you’re close to acting on your feelings and frustration, put the kid in a safe space or with a safe person and take 5. Take 10. Do what it takes to get that under control and remember that this little being is not malicious.

    You will make it through this.