So to start off, I have a pretty severe sinus infection and possibly a severe tooth infection as well. I know the first because I went to an ENT, and I know the second because the ENT I went to- said that he thinks I need to have a dead tooth removed, and that it it’s more than likely also infected.

The problem I have is that I seem to have a bad reaction to the medicine I was given in that I absolute lost my shit when I was on doxycycline. Or it could have been the Fluticasone because apparently that can have some bad reactions exactly like mine.

From out of nowhere… my heart rate was off the charts, horrible panic throughout the evening, disassociation, terrifying dark thoughts of doom and gloom…. the works.

This was Thursday night.

I’ve only JUST begun calming down and then found out when I woke that my childhood-into-mid-adult best friend living on the other side of the country has died.

So I’m not doing well.

I have a bad infection and I can’t take antibiotics for it- (the idea of trying anything else makes me shake with anxiety now) and I have a white knuckle fear of hospitals.

I don’t know what to do.

I know that it’s best to go to the hospital, but they’ll want me to stay there for observation. Which is for the best because if anything happens, I’ll be safe- but the idea of being in a hospital away from everything I know is freaking me out.

How do I do this?