If you haven’t heard this cliche while discussing your neurodivergency with someone, then I envy your luck. Yesterday I fucked up, I feel shitty, but also I am pissed.
Our brains are impulsive af and tend to forget the most important information. We mess up, our RSD (and empathy) kicks in, we feel terrible, we vow to be more careful, but guess what? Thats fucking exhausting.
As a result, we start overthinking our every waking moment, stressing over every little thing. Because, we are trying to be aware of the things we cannot perceive.
At some point, hopefully we realize that we cannot live like that, and we start to arbitrarily ignore our compulsion to overthink. Most often that works out great because most often the threat is not real, but sometimes we make the wrong call.
The times we overthink are still more than the times we do not, and we still mess up. Let us have our fucking peace.
I feel ya man and to be honest I understand what you are getting at more than I understand what others are trying to say, so I just wanted to point that out.
If we let others know of our limitations and they expect us to magically overcome those limitations that’s on them.
Example: I forget things ALL the time. I can’t control what I forget. I try to ensure that I do things to help me remember. But I will forget things. If I’ve explained that to someone and they still get angry with me over forgetting something, that’s their problem. My forgetfulness is far more stressful to me than it is to them and I’m not taking on any extra guilt for their unreasonable expectations of me. I’ll apologize and move on.