In my 20s I dated a girl who kept eye drops on her end table at my place. I wore contacts, and needed eye drops. Thankfully I hated the anticipation of eye drops dropping onto my eye, and always did a pre-drip in my hand before holding it over my eye. Well wasn’t I stunned when I wiped the eye drop off on my shirt, and my shirt was stuck to my hand. Maybe I got powers like Spider-Man! Nope, I almost put nail glue in my eye.

Why the hell did they start making nail glue bottles short and fat like eye drops? Why?!