I apologize if this isn’t allowed, but I wasn’t sure exactly where to put it. Just let me know if it’s inappropriate and I’ll delete. Thanks.

I’m a loner, so my life is basically just work and the internet. Two of my coworkers are among my favorite people in the whole world, but one of them doesn’t like the other one and will complain to me about how they don’t like them.

We work incredibly closely together…only a few feet apart for hours on end. Our job also necessitates that we frequently communicate with one another. In the beginning, I absolutely loved it and there was no conflict.

Now, I often get my one coworker complaining to me that the other is lazy. And I’m not going to lie, the “lazy” one definitely takes more breaks than everyone and doesn’t at all work as hard as the others. But that doesn’t really bother me because she’s a super incredibly nice and friendly person.

But over time it has bothered my hardworking coworker more and more and driven a wedge into what I would have once considered to be a friendship between the 3 of us.

It never gets to the point where there is yelling or arguments or anything, but it absolutely ruins the mood and then I hear about it later.

I interact with these people for hours on end every single day and I’m just not sure how to handle it. I’ve been struggling to know how to deal with it for months now.

To top it all off it gives me endless paranoia that the hardworking coworker secretly resents me and hates me too. This stuff never used to happen before, but know I feel like it’s all that happens.

  • @Thehalfjew
    3•1 year ago

    Fair enough. Sounds like A is going to have to decide whether they talk to B directly, complain to the supervisor that B still isn’t meeting expectations, or drop it. But keeping you in the middle isn’t going to solve the problem and it needs to stop. You can say that firmly but nicely and with validation. (The validation is important to maintaining your relationship with A.)

    At the end of the day, this sounds like a failure at the management level. If B is known to be underperforming, it’s on management to either find a way to help B improve or replace B. Management’s failure here is hurting all 3 of you. A has a right to be pissed. B needs guidance or the boot. And you need to be free of this mess.