The first time in my near-six year spell as a parent I finally had the fabled ‘supermarket meltdown’.

Not for transparency sake I’ll admit, the meltdown began the Moment we left the house and I had the nerve, the gaul to…hold my two year olds hand whilst walking to the shops.

30 minutes later and, well we get to the shops. I’ve been kicked, hit and screamed at for the entire walk because my unruly toddler didn’t want to hold my hand…but also didn’t want to be carried.

And then it happened. Lemons. We didn’t need lemons. He didn’t truly even want them. But alas, he decided this was his hill to die on, and oh boy.

Told him no. Offered him my hand. Nothing. He wouldn’t budge from the lemons. My eldest is off doing her own thing with grandad, but even they heard what was to come: the scream. So much screaming.

I scooped him up whilst trying to hold a jar of Bolagnese sauce and a packet of Garlic and Herb New Potatoes and quickly made my way to the middle of the store. As my toddler screams with the intensity of a thousand angry sun-gods I hand him the goods and make my way outside, away from judging eyes. My son then proceeds to scream for a further five minutes before ultimately, giving in and accepting defeat.

So yeah. That was my Sunday afternoon. I handled it fine but bloody hell it took the shine of what should have been a nice little walk.

How have your kids pissed you off recently??

  • @felbaneEnglish
    14•10 months ago

    This probably doesn’t work for every kid, but when my niece did this I would reinforce the correct answer once or twice and then when she’d insist I’d go rogue. It always managed to defuse/derail what would otherwise be escalating chaos.

    Using your example:

    • What road are we on?
    • Avenue D
    • No, we’re on 2nd street.
    • This is Avenue D, we just passed 2nd street.
    • The sign back there said 2nd street!
    • That’s because it was the sign for 2nd street, which we just passed.
    • No we’re on 2nd street now.
    • Actually we’re on 8th street.
    • Nuh uh!
    • Oh you’re right, we must be on Holiday Road.
    • That’s not… we’re on 2nd street!
    • I must be lost then, I thought we were on Farmer Boulevard. Maybe we should stop for directions?
    • No look at the signs! They tell you where we are!
    • That sign says 11th street, and that sign says Avenue D. Which one do you think we’re on?
    • I think Avenue D…?
    • Okay good we’re not lost. I was so worried!