Here are some specific questions.
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Are the upvotes and downvotes I make, private? If I report a comment, is my report private?
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Can someone follow me across lemmy instances based on my username?
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If I want to make a community, is there a reason I would choose one lemmy over another?
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Are the powers of moderators similar to reddit’s?
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Where can I find a list of most active lemmy instances?
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Any other differences from reddit I should know about?
To add to what others are saying, there is a list that may be helpful. Let me explain it a bit though.
The list below shows various Lemmy instances in a table. An instance can block another instances (this is what they control). The instance can be blocked by someone else (which they can’t control). Either way, a block is in place so the two cannot communicate.
The column header BL specifies how many instances they are blocking. The column header BB says how many instances are blocking them.
If they have a high BL, they likely do not want to federate with many other instances which can be a drawback. If they have a high BB, that instance is likely acting in such a poor manner that nobody wants to interact with them. Basically, you may want to reconsider instances which have an excessively high BL or BB.
Note that there are pretty bad places out there so having a BL of 0 can be an issue as well. A BB of 0 may indicate that an instance is very new so nobody really knows about them yet.
The list is sorted by how many users are at an instance. If the instance has a high amount of users, the service is likely a higher quality service that can grow over time. Small services aren’t bad per say but they may eventually disappear or overload if too many people join them.
Like most things, this is just more information to help guide you in your decision making. The best decision is one that you make on your own after you do your own research.
Anyway, the list is below.
https://github.com/maltfield/awesome-lemmy-instances/blob/main/README.md#all-lemmy-instances