Some developers have expressed concerns about the inability to test their games pre-release. However, Denuvo maintains that truly secure software should be inaccessible to everyone – including its creators.

In a quarterly earnings call, Denuvo celebrated that while unit sales have dropped to zero, piracy rates have also plummeted. “Our investors see this as an absolute win,” noted Barrett. “You can’t put a price on perfect security. Though technically, we just did.”

When asked how games could be tested before release, Barrett suggested an innovative honor system: “Developers can simply imagine how their game might play, and pirates can imagine pirating it. Everyone wins.”

At press time, Denuvo’s latest earnings report remained unreadable due to its own encryption.

insanity defined