Selena Gomez is reflecting on one of the hardest chapters of her life.
In the latest issue of Fast Company, the 31-year-old Rare Beauty founder explains how her breakup with Justin Bieber and bipolar diagnosis led to her taking an extended break from social media.
“I had just gotten my heart broken. I didn’t need to see what everyone was doing,” the “Single Soon” singer tells the magazine. “Then there were those moments of not feeling positive about how I looked because of what I’d see on Instagram. Wow, I wish my body looked like that.”
In 2018, Gomez and Bieber ended their years-long on-again, off-again relationship. Around the same time, the “Lose You to Love Me” singer was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Today, Bieber is married to wife Hailey and Gomez has confirmed that she is single and living life.
In 2020, Gomez shared the news of her diagnosis for the first time during a conversation with Miley Cyrus – a choice she made to inspire her fans and followers who were there to support her through different stages of her life.
“I wanted there to be a conversation started,” Gomez says. “I wasn’t ashamed, and I wanted it to lead to something healing.”
Gomez reveals that she could no longer hide the truth about her diagnosis out of fear of people not liking her.
“I grew up being a people pleaser,” she shares. “I had a responsibility at a very young age, young people were looking up to me. I didn’t know who I was. Having that responsibility would make me walk on eggshells a lot. I thought maybe it would be damaging to tell people who I am. It started to become a threat that freaked me out. Well, if you’re not right, then you can’t work.”
She adds, “I went through a really hard season. It was my highs and my lows, and I didn’t know what to do, so I couldn’t control it. I would want to cancel things. It was just a tormented feeling. That’s why, when I found out my diagnosis, it was just, ‘Oh, okay, I feel a bit relieved, I understand a bit more.’ I got second opinions. I went to doctors. I’m fortunate enough to be able to have people who can help me survive every day.”
Today, the Only Murders in the Building star confirms that she is no longer a “sad girl,” and the proof is in her upcoming music.
“I love sad-girl music, I’m really good at that,” she tells Fast Company about her latest era. “However, I can’t really write that if I’m not sad. I’ve had to relearn what being me and being happy looked like. There is not one sad song on this whole album.”
While she is living in her current state of success and happiness, Gomez is realistic when it comes to the thought of having bad days in the future.
“I’ve never promised anyone that I’ll never have a bad day again,” she says. “I’ve always been honest with my fans. Even when I take breaks from social media, I’ll say I’m taking a break.”
Gomez also has found hope in sharing her experience, and has a key piece of advice for anyone who is thinking about making decisions, good or bad.
“All I would say is, ‘Every choice you make is yours. At the end of the day, you have to be proud of it. If it ends up being a mistake, it’s your mistake to learn. Take a lesson from that. Does it make you feel good? Does it not? Evaluate and get to know yourself as much as you can.’ But I would never say don’t do something, because I don’t live with regrets,” the beauty mogul says when asked what advice she would give her fans. “I can relate to a whole sea of beautiful human beings, because I’ve walked through some really tough moments, and now I’m on the other side.”