In the last year or so I started to see so many people of my age that have done truly incredible things and still doing more.
For the vast majority of my life my only goals were gettimg academic satisfaction and doing unproductive stuff in the free time to get temporary pleasure. No end goal whatsoever.
I kind of don’t know what I’ve been doing in the last 17 years while someone gets a patent on solar systems, other invents a new recyclable plastic, and another found a successful startup. I mean, they all find what they’re supposed to be doing with their lives and excel in them.
I feel overwhelmed for trying to pace up with these kind of people. Yet I don’t like the way the things are and I can’t do anything but envy those people.
Anyone with experience in this regard? How did you deal with this? Did you eventually “pace up” with these people or was it too late or an unattainable goal?
Edit: Whoops, I didn’t expect so many replies! Thanks, I’ll look into them all

    • DreamerOfImprobableDreams
      16•1 year ago

      Can we not do the whole “women are objects to be ranked based on physical appearance only and fought over as prizes” thing, please? That prom queen has agency of her own-- who’s to say she’s even into the “winner”, let alone that their personalities are in any way compatible? Maybe (assuming she’s interested in men and looking for a relationship) she’d rather be with a guy who isn’t hypercompetitive, who’s more laid back and easygoing?

      Which brings me to the other problem with your metaphor: what’s “winning”? Someone could be doing well by society’s metrics and be miserable, because their current lifestyle isn’t the right fit for them. Someone else could be a total failure by society’s metrics, but perfectly content with their life the way it is. Who’s the real winner there? (Spoiler alert: it’s the second person).

    • @buddhabound
      13•1 year ago

      This is such a short-sighted take. My wife was prom queen… 3 years before I met her. I forgot about it completely until I read your post and thought, “what a childish thing to say, no one cares about that.” Why? Because I have 20 years of history with my wife. 2 children, a good job, a good life, and a happy family. Exactly 0% of that has anything to do with a prom that happened years before we met.

      I want to live a long and happy life, and have as many days as possible with my wife, my children, and maybe their children (if they decide to have any). The things that worry me aren’t whether or not I’m having sex with a former prom queen, but how can I stay healthy so I can have a chance to make as many memories with the people I love as possible. It’s about whether or not they feel loved, accepted, and fulfilled. High school popularity has no value whatsoever to healthy, adjusted adults.