Sheriff Greg Capers was the classic picture of a Texas lawman as he announced the capture of a suspected mass killer: white cowboy hat on his head, gold star pinned to his chest, white cross on his belt and a large pistol emblazoned with his name on his hip.

As a Texan, we’re all a little bit off, and we all get one or two kitschy affectations (pretty sure it’s in the state constitution), but never trust a public official who starts busting them out on the job. Looking at you, Greg Abbot with your stupid faux-military Department of Public Safety outfits (he has at least three), or this thieving good ol’ boy with his hat, shades, cross, THREE badges, and personalized gun.

And seriously, what an asshole. Ignoring his job to the point of obvious negligence and decreased public safety to be a literal highwayman and spending the money on gambling.