One of the worst for me was thinking about the past, the people, the things that happened, the incidents, and finding out that it was always me or my actions that were the reason something went wrong for somebody. Everything, always. I guess this fits into the chart’s self-loathing sector.
Not necessarily - e.g. if you’ve been shitty to people in the past (I say “if” but we’ve literally all done that:-P) then that’s a natural process of growth to recognize that, hopefully make reparations and move toward healing, at least on your side but again hopefully on both.
Then again, your “actions” are not always up to you - e.g. if traffic made you late somewhere then that’s at least partially out of your control - but you can only accept your own portion of responsibility there (reasonably anyway).
Be careful with “Everything, always” language bc it’s always a lie:-|. e.g. I bet you could find a single instance, somewhere, where you did not do that. Perhaps find it and start to move forward from there?
I haven’t been in that place for years, decades even. The “everything, always” was the feeling when the days were the darkest and I was pretty much a recluse in my apartment.
Luckily it didn’t last for too many weeks and I got a lot better. Of course I did mistakes in my past, but when I think about how absurdly distorted view of the past events I had in my mind it reminds me of how the depression can really fuck a person up.
One of the worst for me was thinking about the past, the people, the things that happened, the incidents, and finding out that it was always me or my actions that were the reason something went wrong for somebody. Everything, always. I guess this fits into the chart’s self-loathing sector.
Not necessarily - e.g. if you’ve been shitty to people in the past (I say “if” but we’ve literally all done that:-P) then that’s a natural process of growth to recognize that, hopefully make reparations and move toward healing, at least on your side but again hopefully on both.
Then again, your “actions” are not always up to you - e.g. if traffic made you late somewhere then that’s at least partially out of your control - but you can only accept your own portion of responsibility there (reasonably anyway).
Be careful with “Everything, always” language bc it’s always a lie:-|. e.g. I bet you could find a single instance, somewhere, where you did not do that. Perhaps find it and start to move forward from there?
I haven’t been in that place for years, decades even. The “everything, always” was the feeling when the days were the darkest and I was pretty much a recluse in my apartment.
Luckily it didn’t last for too many weeks and I got a lot better. Of course I did mistakes in my past, but when I think about how absurdly distorted view of the past events I had in my mind it reminds me of how the depression can really fuck a person up.
It does not help that it gets confirmed every day. It’s only possible to lie to yourself so and so often before it all comes back. It’s all my fault.
Depression is like being stuck thinking of the past and anxiety of the future