Thinks that water destroys magnets.

No no, you see: water is 2 parts hydrogen and 1 part oxygen. Hydrogen is a key component of nukes, and nukes destroy magnets. Trump was telling us in code, because the baby-eating Dems are looking for an excuse to have him replaced with a body double so he can’t give obvious messages.

—Some Qonspircy Theorist

^{I hope the satire is obvious}