People come up to me and ask, “SwingingTheLamp, is it true that JD Vance put his dick in a couch?” I dunno. People are saying that JD Vance fucked a couch. Great people, some of the best people are saying it. We have the best couches in this country. Did you ever notice that? Best, sexiest couches. Migrants are flooding across the border to defile our couches. Dropping loads between our cushions, not even a rubber glove. It’s disgusting. We have to keep our couches safe for good, American dicks.
https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/jd-vance-couch-cushions/
Every Republican will tell you that Snopes is not a reliable source. If they say it’s false, then it must be true, right?!
Har!
Like I’m going to trust the crooked liberal media.
That’s not fair, even AP had to say there’s no way to actually prove he didn’t fuck a couch!
People come up to me and ask, “SwingingTheLamp, is it true that JD Vance put his dick in a couch?” I dunno. People are saying that JD Vance fucked a couch. Great people, some of the best people are saying it. We have the best couches in this country. Did you ever notice that? Best, sexiest couches. Migrants are flooding across the border to defile our couches. Dropping loads between our cushions, not even a rubber glove. It’s disgusting. We have to keep our couches safe for good, American dicks.