I feel like my response would be “…ooookay? Why do you feel I need to know? As long as who you’re bringing home treats you well and isn’t a general asshole, why would I care about anything else? Have I given you the impression that was an issue to us?”
Though I mean that specifically in the “coming out” sense. If she brought it up over dinner I’d probably say “okay. Just make sure they’re not an asshole and they treat you right.”
A kid wants to share a big life change they have discovered. It doesn’t need to materially affect you for it to be meaningful that they want to share it with you.
Wow. Just, wow. I’m curious, do you have any kids?
“Oookay, why do you feel I should know?” should never be something a parent tells their child when they divulge a personal thing like that… If you have kids, learn some compassion for others. If you want kids someday, learn some compassion for others. If you don’t want kids at all, fucking learn some compassion for others. It will make your life more frictionless
I have kids. Whenever we say anything in reference bringing someone home (to my daughter, currently) or future spouse or whatever, we always say, like, “if you bring a boy home, or girl, or whatever…” or “your future husband or wife, if you even decide to get married…”
So basically, it’s always been an understood thing that whoever she wants to be involved with (or not be involved with) is all the same to us. It just… wouldn’t be any kind of a revelation. She would just bring home whoever she brought home, and I don’t think it would even occur to her to “come out” as anything.
It doesn’t work that way. Communication is key, unspoken words and understanding is in the eye of the beholder and a source of misunderstanding and broken families.
We always been honest about the emotional relationship both my wife and me, how it is normal to love and sometimes loath eachother, emotional intelligence and all…but he has a different sense of what love and relationship means to him, he opened up on his feelings when he felt the timing was right because he finally understood what he felt. Coming out isn’t mandatory coming out of a closet, it can be when everything makes sense. We never repressed him, he always got to choose his own path. That 's what it is.
I feel like my response would be “…ooookay? Why do you feel I need to know? As long as who you’re bringing home treats you well and isn’t a general asshole, why would I care about anything else? Have I given you the impression that was an issue to us?”
Though I mean that specifically in the “coming out” sense. If she brought it up over dinner I’d probably say “okay. Just make sure they’re not an asshole and they treat you right.”
A kid wants to share a big life change they have discovered. It doesn’t need to materially affect you for it to be meaningful that they want to share it with you.
Wow. Just, wow. I’m curious, do you have any kids?
“Oookay, why do you feel I should know?” should never be something a parent tells their child when they divulge a personal thing like that… If you have kids, learn some compassion for others. If you want kids someday, learn some compassion for others. If you don’t want kids at all, fucking learn some compassion for others. It will make your life more frictionless
I have kids. Whenever we say anything in reference bringing someone home (to my daughter, currently) or future spouse or whatever, we always say, like, “if you bring a boy home, or girl, or whatever…” or “your future husband or wife, if you even decide to get married…”
So basically, it’s always been an understood thing that whoever she wants to be involved with (or not be involved with) is all the same to us. It just… wouldn’t be any kind of a revelation. She would just bring home whoever she brought home, and I don’t think it would even occur to her to “come out” as anything.
It doesn’t work that way. Communication is key, unspoken words and understanding is in the eye of the beholder and a source of misunderstanding and broken families.
We always been honest about the emotional relationship both my wife and me, how it is normal to love and sometimes loath eachother, emotional intelligence and all…but he has a different sense of what love and relationship means to him, he opened up on his feelings when he felt the timing was right because he finally understood what he felt. Coming out isn’t mandatory coming out of a closet, it can be when everything makes sense. We never repressed him, he always got to choose his own path. That 's what it is.