• @[email protected]
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    1 month ago

    Maybe he just likes summer breaks as well. Then he gets back in the fall, and is all like “oh shit I need a new plan to kill that kid, uh…maybe I can send a man rat to sleep with his best friend? It’ll take me at least until the spring to get that going, though.”

    • @[email protected]
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      1 month ago

      “M-my Lord…”
      “Yess? What is it Pettigrew?”
      “Y-your appearance, my Lord… w-won’t the others ask questions about w-where you’ve been?”
      “Oh pleasse. Like I’m the first Dark Lord to get a tan.”
      “I was… I was r-referring to y-your Hawaiian shirt, my Lord.”
      “…”
      “Look, my luggage was delayed at Gatwick and they said they’d deliver it today. Okay?”

    • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet
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      31 month ago

      Voldemort’s plans are always akin to Doctor Evil’s. Needlessly complicated, and easily thwarted.

      • FenrirIII
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        429 days ago

        “I want sharks with friggin’ wands on their heads! Is that too much to ask?!”