I’m very glad you’re happy where you are. Most people that have had kids have said this to me. But I do occasionally have the rare person who actually has kids but recommends I don’t have them. One of the people that told this to me is incredibly sweet and motherly, even to me, but she seems to be able to look past the feel good hormones and realize that it’s not something a lot of people should be doing.
When I visit family members or friends who have kids, it honestly seems like a living nightmare. Not that their children are shitty kids, but just the amount of constant work and attention they need and how you can never do anything for yourself ever again. And you have to do this until they grow up and maybe move out. I can barely even take care of myself mentally or physically. Doing that for multiple human beings sounds like literal torture. I will have people tell me they love raising kids while at the same time they have come into work on only few hours sleep because something happened with the kids in the middle of the night.
I’m convinced the only reason why people get hooked on the whole having kids things is because of some sort of hormonal thing. Observing everything from the outside, it just looks like everyone has Stockholm syndrome or brain slugs.
I hope you don’t find this offensive and I’m sure you’re a great dad. I know your kids are lucky to have you and we do still need at least SOME people to be willing to be parents for the sake of the human race. But yeah idk.
It’s definitely not for everyone. And it depends a lot on your support network. I could pretty easily get someone to have them with a little bit of notice. I still regularly go out and away.
But that is also a kind of selection bias. Kids tend to get hyper and show off when they have guests. You’re potentially seeing them at their worst a lot of the time.
They’re also in bed relatively early so you often have your evenings free. So not much more time than if you worked full time with a long commute.
I’m very glad you’re happy where you are. Most people that have had kids have said this to me. But I do occasionally have the rare person who actually has kids but recommends I don’t have them. One of the people that told this to me is incredibly sweet and motherly, even to me, but she seems to be able to look past the feel good hormones and realize that it’s not something a lot of people should be doing.
When I visit family members or friends who have kids, it honestly seems like a living nightmare. Not that their children are shitty kids, but just the amount of constant work and attention they need and how you can never do anything for yourself ever again. And you have to do this until they grow up and maybe move out. I can barely even take care of myself mentally or physically. Doing that for multiple human beings sounds like literal torture. I will have people tell me they love raising kids while at the same time they have come into work on only few hours sleep because something happened with the kids in the middle of the night.
I’m convinced the only reason why people get hooked on the whole having kids things is because of some sort of hormonal thing. Observing everything from the outside, it just looks like everyone has Stockholm syndrome or brain slugs.
I hope you don’t find this offensive and I’m sure you’re a great dad. I know your kids are lucky to have you and we do still need at least SOME people to be willing to be parents for the sake of the human race. But yeah idk.
It’s definitely not for everyone. And it depends a lot on your support network. I could pretty easily get someone to have them with a little bit of notice. I still regularly go out and away.
But that is also a kind of selection bias. Kids tend to get hyper and show off when they have guests. You’re potentially seeing them at their worst a lot of the time.
They’re also in bed relatively early so you often have your evenings free. So not much more time than if you worked full time with a long commute.