How not just give up? There is nothing left, no viable career options, hobbies are pointless because there’s just no improvement past certain point anyway, no alleviation to the fucking constant hurt that’s AuDHD. And nobody gets it, nobody.
Any insight, other than “seek help”, would be welcome right about now.
One thing to consider is having a reason to live. Find something you care about or are interested in an leverage that interest.
Think of it like a car. Making explosions doesn’t actually do anything for us in terms of getting somewhere, so we have to make a complex machine to turn that force into motion. I have an interest in electronics, so making electronic things to, for example, weigh my washing basket to tell me when to put on a load will turn some of that interest into activity.
As for nobody getting it, my partner does. They are my rock and they need me, so double win there. When I am having overwhelm they don’t judge or condemn, they actually understand and help me find my calm and get things sorted. It took a lot of luck to find my partner and years of working together to be functional but now we are like an engine and a gearbox. They help me convert my efforts into useful stuff. They also help me know when to take a break and rest. Maybe something similar can exist for you?
You really need to take a step back if you are looking for reasons to live. Life is valuable and just being here enough reason to stay alive. You are valued even if you don’t think you are.