My neighbor is in her 70s. I’m in my late 20s and live in the apartment upstairs from her, so when it snows I like to help clean off her car/shovel out her parking spot. Today she tried to pay me after I helped her. I don’t want to accept the money, but want her to still feel comfortable asking for help/not feel like she’s taking advantage of me. How should I go about this? Maybe ask her for something small so she feels like she’s helping me too? It’s never any trouble helping her with the snow removal, it never takes more than half an hour
No matter what she offers refuse as politely as you can … if she really insists and is upset about it, accept it and maybe just use it to buy a new shovel or something.
I have elderly neighbours myself and I help them when I can or when they ask for it. Just let them know that you are available … but also set boundaries and don’t let them think that you are on call 24 hours a day. My neighbours asked for a help a month or so ago and I wasn’t around to help so I had to tell them I couldn’t. But nines of out of ten, I’m there for them if they ask. But at the same time, if they called me at 2am for an emergency, I’d run out to help them.
Just remember the golden rule about neighbours and being neighbourly … ‘stay close to your neighbours but not too close’ … be nice to them, but don’t involve yourself too much or too far as that will get you into deep trouble that might not be good for either of you.