I don’t really understand why people do it. Not like “they’re doing it because they are depressed and feel bad”, I had depression myself but never had a call to injure myself. I hate pain, and doing something painful to myself while I’m already feeling bad doesn’t really sound appealing. So I don’t quite get what self-harm gives people so they keep doing it.

Like, is it a way to “ground” yourself and stop dissociating, or is it “just to feel anything at all”, or as a “punishment”, or something else?

  • @[email protected]
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    -61 year ago

    Hey OP, I know you mean well and are genuinely curious, but once you have your answer you should consider deleting this post.

    Discussion of most things in most formats is good, but discussing suicide and self harm is tricky. It can trigger suicidal thoughts, it can make sufferers feel ostracised, it can discourage people from seeking help.

    It’s great that you don’t feel a compulsion to harm yourself, but try to imagine how it would feel for someone trying to resist that compulsion for weeks on end to read anecdotes from dozens of people about the just don’t get it.

    • Raltoid
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      1 year ago

      Deleting it goes against the premise of “No stupid questions”. Hiding information in a place literally made to give out information without judging the question, is literally the opposite of the intent.


      Many questions posted here are easily answer through wikipedia, and people might ask them in a place like this for a multitude of reasons. One of them being that they avoid looking it up directly as a way to limit themselves getting triggered from the pictures or text that might be there, and just want a more summarized answer to their question.

      • @[email protected]
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        11 year ago

        There are plenty of subjects inappropriate for this sub.

        I’m sure I don’t need to enumerate them for you.

        I think a discussion around whether this type of question is appropriate is entirely healthy, as there may be ramifications which are not immediately clear.

    • @rhacer
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      1 year ago

      We are all responsible for our own mental health. The OP is not responsible for anyone’s mental health but his own.

      Saying some discussion needs to be hidden away because someone somewhere may react negatively is patently ridiculous and damaging to society.

      I have a trigger, and just like my self-harm it is atypical, I am triggered by parents showing pride in their children. Doesn’t matter if it’s real life, or film, or book. It always turns me into a wreck, and sometimes has me believing I’m worthless in dangerous ways.

      Should my expectation be that those around me not show pride in their children? Should I demand warnings on all material that depicts parents showing pride in their children? It’s ridiculous. My trigger is MY responsibility.

      • @[email protected]
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        11 year ago

        Media doesn’t report on suicide or self harm except in cases where it’s justified by public interest. (Interest as in “needs to know” not interest as in “curious”). Is that patently ridiculous?

    • Peruvian_Skies
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      41 year ago

      Or maybe seeing this habit be discussed openly and without prejudice will help some people to feel less like a freak for doing it when they realize that others do too, or will encourage them to seek help.

      I know it’s a horse of a different color, but the last time my depression got really bad I started smoking. I felt awfully guilty about it for months until my therapist said that it was natural for me to seek out endorphins however I could when I was failing to get them the natural way. That relieved the guilt, which in turn made me less psychologically dependent on cigarettes. Accepting that I smoked and that it was not ideal but still okay actually helped me to quit smoking later on, coupled with my regular therapy. Why would you deny that to people with other unhealthy habits? Or maybe you think that inhaling cancer smoke several times per day isn’t a form of self-harm?

      • @[email protected]
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        11 year ago

        Discussing something with a therapist is an entirely different proposition to reading about it online.

          • @[email protected]
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            11 year ago

            It doesn’t imply that it isn’t helpful.

            Clearly, there are risks around this type of discussion which a therapist is trained to manage.