So, I saw a report from one of my users. They reported:
https://ponder.cat/post/1594852/1813842
For the reason:
Unreasonable fighting with everyone in every simple post
I think that’s ridiculous, so I talked with them about it. Posting private communications is frowned upon I guess, but long story short, they weren’t receptive. I’ve decided to ban the account.
IMO the general culture on Lemmy is that users are entitled to their free account and everyone needs to be careful and circumspect about limiting that entitlement in any way, but I don’t see it that way. I don’t think it’s a requirement for me to provide hosting space for anyone who wants to use my stuff as a jumping-off point for abuse of Lemmy’s systems, and isn’t apologetic or receptive when I talk with them about not doing that. The fact that it’s in service of harassing FlyingSquid in particular is just icing on the cake, since my perception is that people like to harass him apparently for no legitimate reason at all (with this as an example).
AITA?
What in the actual fuck are you talking about? The user is deliberately block evading. Its so bad, I am going to start publishing a daily UM blocklist for people.
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I won’t consider you talking with me about this in this thread to be block evasion, FWIW. We’re talking, since you switched to an alt to start an interaction with me, and it’s not really offensive for me to continue this conversation. We might as well. I probably won’t answer a reply, but here’s my take:
This is a really key point.
The internet (and phone system before that) has developed a norm that if someone doesn’t want to hear from you, that’s their right. Over the phone it can actually be illegal. The reasons should be pretty self-explanatory, but it’s basically just anyone’s right to decide that someone’s being obnoxious and they don’t want to hear anything else from that person. Violating that decision is symbolic, on both sides: Some people will get bent out of shape by someone sending even a single ping if they don’t want to hear it, because they tried to set a boundary and it got stomped on. And some people will take a kind of pleasure in violating someone else’s attempts not to hear from them, even if the context is something totally meaningless. You can see kids do this kind of thing with their siblings sometimes when someone sets a boundary. The core issue that gives it power is that factor of consent, or violation of consent.
The internet has decided that communicating with someone who’s checked the box that they don’t want to hear from you is crossing a line. The content or context doesn’t mean anything. That’s why the block function blocks DMs, and posts, and comments. And actually, the same type of person who thinks it’s fun to make comments to someone who doesn’t want to hear them, often will also think it’s fun to make perfectly innocuous comments so they can then claim they’re being abused if the person doesn’t want to hear the innocuous comments, and is making a big deal out of nothing. Again, you can see kids do this sometimes to each other’s boundaries.
It’s not hard to understand. Two separate times, once right after I mentioned you in a comment, you switched from the alt you usually use to one you rarely use, that I don’t have blocked, and then instantly commented on one of my posts. And then feigned perfect ignorance and claimed not to have even noticed that it was me who made the post.
I posted some of the details, just for verifiability by anyone who’s in an admin role, but that’s what happened. Pretty straightforward. You are communicating to me on purpose, dodging around my blocking of you, and then lying about why and how you did it.
I would hope this isn’t true. There’s a reason why we want the pattern of little tiny lights on the screen to look one way and not another way. At the end of the day, it’s all just pixels, but it makes a difference whether what’s on the screen in the words shaped by the pixels is kindness or maliciousness, truth or falsehood, stuff we want or stuff we don’t want. You’re saying you have the right to shape the pixels on my screen, and trying to paint it like I’m making a problem if I inform people that you’re breaking the rules to get them to shape the way you want them, instead of it being the way the network is normally set up to operate, keeping things in a more voluntary pixel-shape instead of an involuntary one.
Harassment is pixels, personal insults are pixels, misinformation is pixels. Your messages are pixels. I would prefer not to have them arranged for me on my screen. Please stop doing creative things to continue sending them to me.
I actually don’t think this message is going to do much, either for your behavior or for the admins’ reactions. Actually I think sending you a thought-through message may just sort of egg you on in terms of giving you attention which is going to lead to further interactions. It’s usually my habit for how to try to first approach problems, though, is just explaining them clearly and addressing what’s going on with them, or answering what people have to say about them.
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I’ll just drop one of your other accounts here: https://sopuli.xyz/post/22490143
(There isn’t any point in reading your stupid rants and crying.)
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It’s your MO.
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Quit mumbling.