As I sit here and wait in Q after running into an invisible wall and disconnecting I couldn’t help but wonder why this is needed to play what is essentially a single player game. Right, it’s because nobody buys horse armor if they can’t show it off in some mmo-ish open world nobody asked for. At least that’s my best guess. This is not just a whine thread though. I genuinely asked myself why I’m putting up with this and it’s because the game has a ton of beauty and fun to it that’s wrapped in annoying monetization and general greed driven fuckery. So as the artists and programmers are carrying a horde of greedy goblins on their backs, I’d like to remind you all to lift with your legs.
Hi.
This is Dave, lead director of the D4 project. I just stopped snorting coke of some round buttocks, to visit this, hmmm, Letme site, seen your post and it moved me deeply enough to register an account and answer you.
To the point: unfortunately, Necromancer class won’t have the option to shout “shake dem boney cheeks for me, chiquita”, while pointing, how you called it “a skeletal dildo” at the enemy. We don’t do that stuff here, we’re proud to call ourselves a progressive enterprise, and…
pardon me for a second
…whew, sorry, my prisoners screamed again. It distracts me while I’m writing and I had to snort even more coke to calm my nerves. I lashed the pair of screamers and put the fear of the Lord into the hearts of the rest by shaking my furry spider toy before their eyes. That’ll teach them to scream in the most improper moments, ahahahaha.
Anyway. Where were we? Ah yes.
The Barb. No, neither Barbie nor Ken are planned to appear in our latest D4 DLC. Despite all their popularity, we all agreed that their style does not exactly match the tone of our game.
I hope this answers some of your questions.
~ Dave “D4 MAIN MAN”
Lol this read like an OG Strongbad email. I approve 👍.