Personally I (a straight person) use it in an attempt to normalize the term, so that people who want to conceal the gender of their partner have plausible deniability. If all straight people say “girlfriend/boyfriend”, then anyone saying “partner” is outed as “a non-straight person trying to conceal the fact”.
I’m bi, but my appearance is pretty queer coded such that cis-het people tend to read me as “unclear gay or just tech-nerd punk”. I’ve found that when I use the word partner, it can throw people off because they’re clearly fishing for my partner’s gender in a “I can’t tell whether this person is straight or gay” way. Most of the people I’ve dated have been men, but I do like the chaos energy of the confusion
Personally I (a straight person) use it in an attempt to normalize the term, so that people who want to conceal the gender of their partner have plausible deniability. If all straight people say “girlfriend/boyfriend”, then anyone saying “partner” is outed as “a non-straight person trying to conceal the fact”.
I’m bi, but my appearance is pretty queer coded such that cis-het people tend to read me as “unclear gay or just tech-nerd punk”. I’ve found that when I use the word partner, it can throw people off because they’re clearly fishing for my partner’s gender in a “I can’t tell whether this person is straight or gay” way. Most of the people I’ve dated have been men, but I do like the chaos energy of the confusion
Cheers to the chaos energy!
@NoIWontPickaName @scubbo As someone with a non-binary partner, thank you for your service
I understand the gender thing that is why i added significant other in there
Significant other sounds so nuch more clinical to me. Language is weird
I do the same, and started for the same reasons.
To me it feels like a simple enough courtesy.
Though I’ll admit now that I also really appreciate the additional privacy provided by the habit, now that I have it.