I recently started playing in a Luanti server and I was having a good time, I tend to be more independent but I usually participate in server events. I also tend to help people out if I am able/know what to do.
However there are times I would interact with what seems to be children, and it feels suffocating. Sometimes when they spot me would sort of type my name into the chats until I respond, and ask me to do stuff with them. Normally that’s okay, but it’s very often and the activity tends to take up a lot of time and would sort of leave me frustrated, like with mining because if they spot a valuable ore I’m mining they would sometimes take it for themselves. Another is when I’m exploring/moving around the world and one of them wants to follow me around, but I dislike being followed around and I like my alone time. I would often humor them and point out some good locations and interesting stuff but when I want to chill by somewhere they also want to be in that spot. Sometimes they can be sort of excitable that they want to go somewhere else and want me to go with them, but I would really prefer to be in my spot.
They aren’t malicious but it really scares me away from being spotted by them or talking in chat when they’re online. Some of them can really insist a lot and they may think me talking to other people means I have time to deal with them. But I’m not their parent and I have my own goals.
Options vary depending on your temperament and goals.
You could tell them no thanks, you are busy. Perfectly reasonable, it can be done kindly, and setting a clear boundary can work wonders.
You could also try managing rather than helping them. By this I mean helping them with the cognitive tasks of figuring out what they want to do and planning that out. This would mean finding a tutorial or video of a build, getting the summary of items needed, and then telling them how to go get those things and organise the storage.
If you go spelunking with them then having them come along as a part of the team and helping with something like strip mining can be very good. If they aren’t interested they can go do something else, but this specific task is something they can do to help. For example, I would make two long lines on the same level connected at one end to create a U shape then have them mine from one side to the other with a gap of two blocks. That simple mining is tedious but much better with extra hands, and the excitement of finding something good is enough to keep them interested often enough.