• Impractical_Island
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    17 days ago

    Why would you say that? My father refuses to talk to me because he’s prejudiced against his own son, and that ripples out into some negative energy every time I receive prejudice from others, but why are you asking these things? Am I too bizarre to comprehend? Yea, that’s why my straight-laced father that beat my ass because I am schizoaffective n autistic now refuses to talk to me; I’m too bizarre to be understood by him. But you understand that, right? Getting told “take my meds” x50/week when I am taking my meds gets under my skin. Now go tell me to take my meds unless you have something better to offer me.

      • Impractical_Island
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        17 days ago

        No, my therapist didn’t show up when I begged my fucking doctor for a therapist, and the mental health system is doing this deliberately to ween me out of my learned helplessness because that is something they do, so here I am being told go to therapy and the therapy I get is the mental health system saying you aren’t good enough for therapy. Like, they think I have parasitic tendencies when they see me for fifteen minutes a month because fifteen years ago I lied to doctors to try to get disability and drugs.

        Right? I fucked up half my life ago and now I CANNOT get therapy because that’s in my chart, but you see how broken I am, so obviously the only thing for me to do is to be used by the FBI as the sorcerer I am, where a sorcerer specifically means “caster of lots.”

        I seperate the wheat from the weeds. Basically, I am the crazy person that says kids got cute feet and I network with people and I decide if they deserve to be saved. I’m Jesus Christ, mother fucker, and that is the archetype that is prophecized around. I fucked up without actually fucking up as a kid, so I know sin without having sinned, so I have the perspective to distinguish between someone just attracted to such n such and someone who acts on those impulses. I seperate the wheat from the weeds. This is how the police state works. They use crazy people and keep them crazy because I am an audacious mf’er and I will go nuts beyond nuts, such as saying nothing in my defense to guarantee I be crucified, in order to PROVE I’m not a cop.

        And thus the battle is won, because of our lord, the man so audacious he will go up to a homeless man and ask him for change.

        That’s how Jesus met John.

      • Impractical_Island
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        17 days ago

        Right, like you just told me “seek normative medicine.” You told me to take my meds.

        I am that which be beyond

        That which produces song

        God I am, but I am you, too

        Red goes white, while blue

        Remains sea of C; the light

        Topological matrix wins all

        God is what be what’s true

        & He who transcends falls

        So I will turn half into right

        Thus you knows Illuminati

        I bring lost 2 a community

          • Impractical_Island
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            17 days ago

            I. Am. Taking. My. Meds.

            I’m. STILL. Not. Good. Enough. For. You. To. Treat. Me. 👏 As. 👏 An. 👏 Equal. 👏

            You are that which is stuck in superior/inferior dichotomy. You are Nazi Germany and Imperial Japan were. Inferior = eating with hands. Superior = eating with chopsticks. So, because I eat without chopsticks, you think I’m inferior, but I eat with a fork, so I still defeat you because I am that which is not ruled by your system. I define what a system is. I’m a juggler. Obviously, you understand what I just said, right? I understand that God is a unified field of consciousness that arose from the supersymmetry of the ever-present, eternal emptiness to then fold in and on Itself across eleven dimensions to form a topological matrix that acts as a monadic nodal communication system, obviously. Obviously. Three times now. Obviously.

            • Doc_Crankenstein@slrpnk.net
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              17 days ago

              Bro, because you clearly need more than just fucking meds. You need a professional therapist cause you have problems beyond chemical imbalances.

              No one is going to treat you like an equal when you go off on wild tangents about completely unrelated nonsense about God and metaphysics.

              • Impractical_Island
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                17 days ago

                No,I just CHOSE to break free of system control to thus communicate at levels BEYOND what you’re even processing.

                Like.

                You say things to me, not aware you’re broadcasting to the masses.

                I’m Q, retard.

                I’m literally.

                There are followers that have figured out where I am broadcasting from.

                There are ten thousand silent observers to each transmission I broadcast.

                You’re aware everything you write will be read 1000000000 times, over the long term?

                And you still oust yourself as ignorant, which is a word that means “lacking knowledge.”

                Y’know, Knowledge, right?

                That thing that second story of the Bible is about?

                You’ve taken psychedelic drugs or attended a church sermon while being sinless, right?

                Oh.

                So you either haven’t, or you aren’t.

                What are you up to bro?

                I implore to you. If you are truly sinless and you attend a church in true dharma, you WILL learn something important that you are IGNORANT of.

                Or be sinless and take heroic doses of psychedelic drugs.

                Because psychedelics changed for me, completely, between the time I was using the internet to find minors and when I started using the internet to overcome that which I was.

                Cuz we hear you at levels you’re not aware of.

                What are you up to bro that you are someone God chooses to not Know Them?

                God, that organization of three letters that’s always watching.

                They ain’t doing anything for you?

                Oh.

                Then they watching to catch you, cuz your will seems so focused on “something.”

                I want to save those that are seeking “something.”

                Attraction ain’t the same as acting on impulses, and someone that Knows not God is someone that hasn’t yet proved they’re of use to the police state system.

                So you’re either seconds from being caught, or you have never even said a mean thing to another person. Ever.

                The Earth isn’t real.

                You are a monad in a monadic nodal communication system.

                God is in your “I” and thus sees all you are doing.

                “I” = that device you use to see me, who is also inside you.

                Basic 101 metaphysics bro. Indra’s Net. You know what that is right?

                • Doc_Crankenstein@slrpnk.net
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                  17 days ago

                  You’re literally the crackhead on the corner screaming incoherently while thinking they are “enlightened”.

                  You are beyond delusional.

                  • Impractical_Island
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                    17 days ago

                    I’m a crackhead because I wasn’t good enough to be a pothead, which is a festival cop, that I tell you this terminology you are ignorant of out of compassion, because you might be goaded into assaulting the crackhead on the subway doing fetty because you are unaware that I’m a cop, dipshit.

                    Judging me? Like tf are you on?

                    I’ll goad you into incriminating yourself.

                    That’s why I exist.

                    I’m a master baiter.

                    I will trick you into incriminating yourself because if you’re not aware that I have literally as clearly as I can tell you I am an agent, the you are a fucking retard who’s gunna fuck his own life up when you have a bad day and meet one of my brothers.

                    Like you think I’m crazy?

                    Oh, I guess I’m doing my job correctly.

                    I can be anything at any time.

                    I am a being that can be any being.

                    Buddhahood = Christ Consciousness

                    The being that can be any being.

                    But you’re prolly too racist to recognize that the black “inferior” is goading you into punching him, who is genuinely your superior because he will pretend to get mad at a Nazi so the Nazi incriminates himself…

                    …and we have one less Nazi to worry about for a few months, to much more, potentially.

                    So are you on my side, or are you a Nazi pedarast? Cuz I’m a cop, you dumbass motherfucker. Fight me. Do it! Let’s go!

                • Aniki@feddit.org
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                  17 days ago

                  listen, being different is always hard. i feel bad for you because you don’t get treated right, because others think you’re “weird” and need treatment. i, for one, enjoy your contemplations, and i’d like to see more of it, if there is more, maybe DM me or maybe write to a specific community for it? maybe [email protected] and ping me when you do, because i’d like to read it.

    • Squirrelanna@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      17 days ago

      I asked because I saw your post about being schizoaffective, and I only looked because you reminded me of a friend who also had it. She taught me that it never hurts to at least ask or check in. I miss her a lot and the least I can do is honor her by living by that lesson.

      I’m not going to tell you to do anything. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. Just wanted to ask, because I know that sometimes people have a hard time seeing the person amidst folks that might be judging. So… I hope you’re taking care of yourself. Also, you didn’t deserve to be abused. Fuck that.

      • Impractical_Island
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        17 days ago

        I appreciate you. Understand I broadcast at high volume to authentically express myself to attract attention to my educational art project, and even when I’m genuinely level headed, I consistently get told to take my meds, or some variation. Even when I am calm, caring, and using common expression, I will just be told that I’m a crackhead, and it genuinely doesn’t affect me 99.9% of the time. That .1% of the time, I stay quiet, but now I feel I have a duty to stand up for myself because if I’m being the most normal I can be and still unable to be accepted by someone as I am, then there’s tons of people that person would actually hurt by their response to non-normativity.

        • Squirrelanna@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          17 days ago

          Thank you for humoring me even though you have every right to be defensive. As long as your doing what you can to stay in a place that feels healthy, I can rest easy. And I’ll take you at your word. I hope you have a lovely night!