Putting aside that it seems unkind to refer to anyone as out of others leagues based on looks alone, there’s a lot of factors that people consider for long term relationships, and for some (see: demisexuals and the like), looks don’t even factor at all.
Yes, everyone is unique and good looking in their own ways. But we cannot ignore that outward appearance is the main factor in modern dating especially when it comes to first moves and is what people base off their first impression. If it doesn’t matter what’s the purpose of dressing up etc to impress others.
when you’re in a relationship, you can become even more attracted to your partner as you get to learn more about their less surface level positive attributes.
Once they could get over that barrier/hurdle then they can get to know you imo. this applies to platonic relationships too i’ve noticed. Throughout my childhood i’ve noticed, especially in HS the loners (regardless of gender) tend to be people that just aren’t conventionally attractive.
So maybe your friends got to know their partners and decided that a 10/10 personality meant more to them than 10/10 looks.
i’m not sure where you got the impression that at any point I was referring to my girl friends when “I asked why unattractive women tend to be able to date men outside of their league in terms of physical appearance” lol. I’m more referring to rather extreme cases, people that look like Predator or Jabba the Hut.
I’m more referring to rather extreme cases, people that look like Predator or Jabba the Hut.
Then it actually routes back to the first comment on this thread, somewhat.
Certain niche fetishes that men in particular engage in, we’ll take the feeder fetish here to base this example on, often involve unconventionally attractive individuals who are often very vulnerable.
Take Obese Woman 1 (OW1 for short).
OW1 has a problematic relationship with food, and is physically obese as a result. This also poses a danger to her health and is likely already affecting her mobility. While this may be unattractive by current society’s standards, it can attract a partner with a feeder fetish.
Meet Feeder Fetish (FF). He’s a relatively attractive man, rich, accomplished, and he’s dating the human equivalent of, as you say, Jabba the Hutt.
FF could have chosen to date OW1 for the express reason that she’s already struggling with her excessive weight and health, because it’s easy to just “support” them by enabling their binge eating, and having them gain weight as a result.
The end goal here is complete dependence on them. FF can continuously push OW1 to eat more and more under the guise of “Oh it makes her happy”, until she’s completely immobile, bedbound and her health is in serious danger. Often, FF might actively resist or try to thwart OW1’s attempts at weight loss even if it’s with the goal of improving their health outcomes.
See this video where a relatively attractive man is upset because his obese partner wanted to lose weight, likely to improve her health. You can search up “feeder couples” on YouTube.
I’ve also heard of men with hero complexes that are specifically attracted to women who are undergoing a bad period of time in their lives for similar reasons, because they’re highly dependant on them, and once they get better, lose attraction and may even try to sabotage their lives to drive them back into a crisis state to regain attraction. (Ref: YouTube vid, Reddit Post)
These may not be healthy relationships, you might be looking at a potentially abusive dynamic.
While you cannot assume this for every relationship, often extreme relationships are based on messed up things behind closed doors.
So yes, in response to a prior comment you made about this - if a woman wasn’t picky she would be able to “stonk” in their relationships. But what risks are they not considering? What red flags are they purposely ignoring when they don’t think too hard about who they choose to date?
Tl;Dr: People can love any shape and size, but it’s not always for good reasons.
Yes, everyone is unique and good looking in their own ways. But we cannot ignore that outward appearance is the main factor in modern dating especially when it comes to first moves and is what people base off their first impression. If it doesn’t matter what’s the purpose of dressing up etc to impress others.
Once they could get over that barrier/hurdle then they can get to know you imo. this applies to platonic relationships too i’ve noticed. Throughout my childhood i’ve noticed, especially in HS the loners (regardless of gender) tend to be people that just aren’t conventionally attractive.
i’m not sure where you got the impression that at any point I was referring to my girl friends when “I asked why unattractive women tend to be able to date men outside of their league in terms of physical appearance” lol. I’m more referring to rather extreme cases, people that look like Predator or Jabba the Hut.
Then it actually routes back to the first comment on this thread, somewhat.
Certain niche fetishes that men in particular engage in, we’ll take the feeder fetish here to base this example on, often involve unconventionally attractive individuals who are often very vulnerable.
Take Obese Woman 1 (OW1 for short).
OW1 has a problematic relationship with food, and is physically obese as a result. This also poses a danger to her health and is likely already affecting her mobility. While this may be unattractive by current society’s standards, it can attract a partner with a feeder fetish.
Meet Feeder Fetish (FF). He’s a relatively attractive man, rich, accomplished, and he’s dating the human equivalent of, as you say, Jabba the Hutt.
FF could have chosen to date OW1 for the express reason that she’s already struggling with her excessive weight and health, because it’s easy to just “support” them by enabling their binge eating, and having them gain weight as a result.
The end goal here is complete dependence on them. FF can continuously push OW1 to eat more and more under the guise of “Oh it makes her happy”, until she’s completely immobile, bedbound and her health is in serious danger. Often, FF might actively resist or try to thwart OW1’s attempts at weight loss even if it’s with the goal of improving their health outcomes.
See this video where a relatively attractive man is upset because his obese partner wanted to lose weight, likely to improve her health. You can search up “feeder couples” on YouTube.
I’ve also heard of men with hero complexes that are specifically attracted to women who are undergoing a bad period of time in their lives for similar reasons, because they’re highly dependant on them, and once they get better, lose attraction and may even try to sabotage their lives to drive them back into a crisis state to regain attraction. (Ref: YouTube vid, Reddit Post)
These may not be healthy relationships, you might be looking at a potentially abusive dynamic.
While you cannot assume this for every relationship, often extreme relationships are based on messed up things behind closed doors.
So yes, in response to a prior comment you made about this - if a woman wasn’t picky she would be able to “stonk” in their relationships. But what risks are they not considering? What red flags are they purposely ignoring when they don’t think too hard about who they choose to date?
Tl;Dr: People can love any shape and size, but it’s not always for good reasons.