• shweddy
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    2 months ago

    I dont get why if you are short you have to hate on women that dont date under 6’. There’s a majority who literally dont give a fuck why do you HAVE to want the ones that do?

    • visnul@lemmy.zip
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      2 months ago

      There’s certainly something there in not wasting time and energy hating [insert negative descriptor] people, but I think actively hate and passively have a hugely negative opinion on are different things.

    • hakase@lemmy.zip
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      2 months ago

      I don’t get why if you are fat you have to hate on men that don’t date under 200 pounds. There’s a majority who literally don’t give a fuck why do you HAVE to want the ones that do?

      • shweddy
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        2 months ago

        Youre trying to mock but like that’s also valid. lol the whole world isnt gonna like you and thats just a fact. You can spend time worrying about the ones that hate you or you can spend time finding the ones that like you. No matter your demographic.

        • hakase@lemmy.zip
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          2 months ago

          I’m only intending to mock people like revelrous who think that only the first opinion is valid. I completely agree with you and it’s encouraging to see other people taking that stance as well. :)

      • revelrous@sopuli.xyz
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        2 months ago

        C’mon guy. This is some low class shit. You have to stop being so reactionary with people.

        • hakase@lemmy.zip
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          2 months ago

          How is my comment any more low class/reactionary than the comment I was responding to?

          Other than “men’s preferences are low class/shallow/reactionary and women’s are high class/just personal preference/justified”, of course.

          • revelrous@sopuli.xyz
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            2 months ago

            Because that was not what the prior post, or mine, was communicating? You have to skip over a lot of nauance to give yourself a reason to find injury and go on the attack here. They vented about the toxic expectation that all women be available to men.

            This is a real thing women deal with that is not true in the reverse. So let them vent. Why pick a fight or be hateful?

                • velma@sh.itjust.works
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                  2 months ago

                  Ah it doesn’t bother me so much as it’s annoying to have him take over comment sections. And I’m not one to allow a man to stalk me and not push back, which I recognize is annoying to others sometimes as well lol

                  Thanks :)

              • hakase@lemmy.zip
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                2 months ago

                Gender war shit is all you ever comment about, so I’m not quite sure why me seeing your public comments on a few posts on the frontpage and replying to them is suddenly “stalking” to you.

                Especially when you’re the one spamming multiple responses to my comments.

                • velma@sh.itjust.works
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                  2 months ago

                  You realize people will know you’re lying if they ever looked at my post history, right?

                  Is it such a shock that a topic like feminism, among many topics, would be of interest to a middle-aged queer woman living in the United States?

            • hakase@lemmy.zip
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              2 months ago

              You have to skip over a lot of nauance to give yourself a reason to find injury and go on the attack here.

              Not at all - you just have to recognize that women’s preferences are seen as natural and healthy, and men’s are seen as predatory, deviant, or bigoted, and that this was just another example of this tired trend that is still actively hurting men from both ends.

              • revelrous@sopuli.xyz
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                2 months ago

                Grasshopper, most people, not all, but most, are good. When you get into contention with them like this, it almost always comes down to a lack of understanding. Sometimes it’s on them. Sometimes it’s on you. The trick is to hunkerdown and figure out who’s running the bigger deficit before you respond accordingly.

                Men are not a mystery to women. They get a firehouse of male point of view starting from the cradle. Unless they grew up in very unique convent, it is inescapable. Its in the curriculum. The histories. The books. Media. Everywhere the default documented experience has been a man’s. They know and understand the pressures that shaped you.

                We teach men fuck all about women. If anything we push them further into ignorance. Societies love their hierarchies, and ignorance is the best way to mantain social divides.

                It’s not your fault that you will have to try harder to reach the same level of understanding. It wasn’t fair to you to deny you this education when you were young and it was easy to pick up. But to understand you have to know you are playing catch up and you will have to try. The effort may be challenging and uncomfortable, and feel nothing like that sweet spike of gratification when you take a swing. Do not mistake what feels good with what is true. Maybe start with some Carl Sagan.

                If you want to talk, we’ll talk. Because yes, the banket perception of ‘women pure, men depraved’ is a thing. But it is ignorance is disregard the thousand years of context, to assume this is only hurts men. Don’t jump down someone’s throat because you don’t understand. Listen, read, grow.

                Tldr: fuck elon musk, get a library card.

                • hakase@lemmy.zip
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                  2 months ago

                  I must admit, I honestly wasn’t expecting your response to “women’s preferences are seen as natural and healthy, and men’s are seen as predatory, deviant, or bigoted and that hurts men” to be “skill issue, get a library card”.

                  That sounds pretty out-of-touch/victim-blamey - maybe you should try listening for once, eh?

                  • revelrous@sopuli.xyz
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                    2 months ago

                    I did. See the listening bit is quiet. You may not have noticed when it was happening. All sorts of dots to connect with you, and I haven’t even stalked your profile.

                    “skill issue, get a library card”.

                    You are being sarcastic, but metaphorically I am putting your face between my palms and trying to get you to nod along as I emphatically say ‘Yes. Library card.’

          • velma@sh.itjust.works
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            2 months ago

            Why do you keep conflating insecure short men that lash out at others with all men?

            • hakase@lemmy.zip
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              2 months ago

              I haven’t done that a single time. Conflating some men with all men is much more your territory than mine, velma.

              Edit: It figures that both comments velma would pick to illustrate this are the exact ones criticizing people like her for conflating some men with all men, not me conflating them myself.

              • velma@sh.itjust.works
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                2 months ago

                Other than “men’s preferences are low class/shallow/reactionary and women’s are high class/just personal preference/justified”, of course.

                you’re all over the thread blaming men who complain about their lived experience as “leading with their insecurities” and generally minimizing the problem.

                You’ve done it twice now. We’re not talking about all men. We’re talking about short men who are particularly insecure and lash out and blame others for their insecurities.