“Although this pattern was consistent across all 3 types of household labour, it was most noticeable for cognitive load.
“Women reported taking on almost 25 per cent more of the thinking, planning, and scheduling involved in running the home and organising family commitments than their partners reported.”
The study not only examined how much work each partner reported doing, but also how differences in opinions of their contributions were linked to relationship quality.
It found that when there were different opinions about how physical and emotional household duties were shared, couples reported greater unhappiness in the relationship, with this finding strongest for women.
Disparities in the perceived division of cognitive household demands were only linked to poorer relationship quality in men.
“The findings indicate that 2 people in the same relationship may experience and interpret the division of household responsibilities very differently, and these differences matter for relationship quality,’’ Dr Coundouris said.
Growing up my mom knew everything of our household plans, chores, stuff the kids needed, etc except when my father surprised everyone by inviting people to a cookout or something that night. And yeah they had a famously miserable marriage.
I’ve had to carry a lot of the cognitive domestic labor at times in my marriage (we’re both women) and yeah, it’s exhausting and if there wasn’t a good reason my wife needed me to do it our marriage would not be nearly as happy and loving as it is.