I have strong feelings of disgust and passive agressivness every time a man wants to have sexual advances with me.
It makes me want to crush a glass against their skull, genuinely. I don’t do it obvi but I have the intrusive thoughts to physically hurt them every time they start to get sexual even if we’re trying to date.
It also makes me lose any sexual attraction. I know you’re going to say that I should get with an asexual guy. They’re very little around and the few I met still had sexual needs somehow which made me immediately leave and block them.
As someone that was married to someone that decided that they were asexual after a decade of marriage, and who verbally, emotionally, and sometimes physically abused me because I’m NOT asexual, and I only got out of the relationship because I failed to complete a suicide, I would strongly advise you to not look for any kind of relationships - including friendships - until you have yourself under control. You are absolutely going to cause harm to anyone that you’re in any kind of relationship with unless and until you can get your shit together.
I could never think of doing that to someone, tho I don’t understand why shouldn’t I look for friendships?
I don’t think it’s wrong to have friendships at all. Your question was about romantic relationships, though, and thus the above person replied in terms of that.
They specified that I shouldn’t be looking for friendships as well, not just relationships