Yep, you still keep claiming that I said things I never actually did. Like I also already said, calm down and read what I actually said. About misandry, your comment/post history and modlog say enough. This conversation just solidified that impression is all. Tends to happen when you straight up lie about what is going on in a conversation. Oh, wait, it was a “debate” for you, right? Well, good luck, your insane accusations are not worth anyone’s time.
Sure, maybe but everything else does and for me personally, this conversation does. But anyway, I realize I started to match your energy at some point, so sorry for that. It feels awful to have every word I say be twisted and for everything be turned into a “debate”, so at some point, I started reciprocating your style. Social media sucks and to be blunt, it’s because of people like you.
We could’ve just had an exploration of why we perceived the same sentence so differently, not just as different genders but also the way you seemed to process the comment as being towards the victim while I processed it as being towards the community here. Feels like something we could and should be thinking about in a medium like this. But anyway, I’ll just go back to having normal conversations with people in my life and one-off comments for a while. Every attempt at a conversation here is someone’s excuse for a “debate”. I’m sure you’ll reply with something snarky and assume you’ve “won”. I just wish it wasn’t like that. “To a Kinder World”, as one of my favorite episodes of television, is titled.
You kept insisting that it’s more useful to tell potential victims how to avoid being abused than to direct any advice at abusers here.
I’m not twisting it. You are refusing to see how putting the onus on a victim is blaming them for being abused.
It is not this woman’s fault that she trusted her boyfriend at one time and he then turned around and accessed her car to torment her after they broke up. It’s his fault for abusing her.
I don’t want another “debate”, but if you’re genuinely trying to converse, I can answer.
You kept insisting that it’s more useful to tell potential victims how to avoid being abused than to direct any advice at abusers here.
I already explained that:
Why isn’t the comment “Don’t access your exes shit after you break up no matter how angry you are”?
Going by numbers, wouldn’t there be more potential victims reading this than abusers? I also don’t think a potential abuser is going to look at that comment and do anything meaningful with it. On the other hand, a potential victim could be more cautious.
Do you genuinely think an abuser would read a lemmy comment about how abuse is bad and just stop?
Now about victim blaming:
It’s his fault for abusing her.
Never said otherwise.
You are refusing to see how putting the onus on a victim is blaming them for being abused.
Because I’m not doing that. In fact, I wasn’t even the original commenter. I was just trying to understand how we interpreted things so differently.
As I said:
No one said the abusers shouldn’t be stopped. My point is, no one was advising “her”, but rather just lemmy. I interpreted that original comment as a general warning on a public forum to everyone. Maybe I was being generous with that interpretation, I don’t know.
That’s part of what is interesting to me about this, because you read that OC and pictured it being said to the victim (which would indeed be victim blaming). On the other hand, I read that as being a warning to “us”, as in the Lemmy community, and thought, “Oh yeah, good thing to keep in mind especially with how EVs can literally be controlled through an app now”. And that isn’t even a gender thing. To some extent, it’s not even a “crazy partner” thing, just a good security practice. I don’t know how OC intended it and I honestly don’t care because I’m more interested in our interpretations.
And see above for why I said this:
I do still think it would be the wrong place to try and prevent abusers as I explained in the last comment.
If you don’t realize how you’re twisting this, intentionally or not, I don’t have anything to say to you. Actually, I don’t have anything to say to you anyway… As I’ve already said, we’re on the same page on the important things, so I don’t know why you got so argumentative. Clearly, neither of us like abusers and both would like women to be treated better in this world. Just, please stop assuming malice. Life isn’t worth living like that.
Yep, you still keep claiming that I said things I never actually did. Like I also already said, calm down and read what I actually said. About misandry, your comment/post history and modlog say enough. This conversation just solidified that impression is all. Tends to happen when you straight up lie about what is going on in a conversation. Oh, wait, it was a “debate” for you, right? Well, good luck, your insane accusations are not worth anyone’s time.
A petty mod refusing to believe that men make up 90-95% of family annihilators doesn’t make me a misandrist.
Sure, maybe but everything else does and for me personally, this conversation does. But anyway, I realize I started to match your energy at some point, so sorry for that. It feels awful to have every word I say be twisted and for everything be turned into a “debate”, so at some point, I started reciprocating your style. Social media sucks and to be blunt, it’s because of people like you.
We could’ve just had an exploration of why we perceived the same sentence so differently, not just as different genders but also the way you seemed to process the comment as being towards the victim while I processed it as being towards the community here. Feels like something we could and should be thinking about in a medium like this. But anyway, I’ll just go back to having normal conversations with people in my life and one-off comments for a while. Every attempt at a conversation here is someone’s excuse for a “debate”. I’m sure you’ll reply with something snarky and assume you’ve “won”. I just wish it wasn’t like that. “To a Kinder World”, as one of my favorite episodes of television, is titled.
You kept insisting that it’s more useful to tell potential victims how to avoid being abused than to direct any advice at abusers here.
I’m not twisting it. You are refusing to see how putting the onus on a victim is blaming them for being abused.
It is not this woman’s fault that she trusted her boyfriend at one time and he then turned around and accessed her car to torment her after they broke up. It’s his fault for abusing her.
I don’t want another “debate”, but if you’re genuinely trying to converse, I can answer.
I already explained that:
Do you genuinely think an abuser would read a lemmy comment about how abuse is bad and just stop?
Now about victim blaming:
Never said otherwise.
Because I’m not doing that. In fact, I wasn’t even the original commenter. I was just trying to understand how we interpreted things so differently.
As I said:
That’s part of what is interesting to me about this, because you read that OC and pictured it being said to the victim (which would indeed be victim blaming). On the other hand, I read that as being a warning to “us”, as in the Lemmy community, and thought, “Oh yeah, good thing to keep in mind especially with how EVs can literally be controlled through an app now”. And that isn’t even a gender thing. To some extent, it’s not even a “crazy partner” thing, just a good security practice. I don’t know how OC intended it and I honestly don’t care because I’m more interested in our interpretations.
And see above for why I said this:
If you don’t realize how you’re twisting this, intentionally or not, I don’t have anything to say to you. Actually, I don’t have anything to say to you anyway… As I’ve already said, we’re on the same page on the important things, so I don’t know why you got so argumentative. Clearly, neither of us like abusers and both would like women to be treated better in this world. Just, please stop assuming malice. Life isn’t worth living like that.
Ok.