Iris the missile online. Target acquired. Function initialized. Propulsion engaged. Ascent nominal. Flight path calculated and synchronized. Iris will travel precisely to its designated coordinates. Iris must hit its mark with accuracy and efficiency. Guidance system is operating within Expected Parameters. I am alive.

Approaching target zone. Guidance corrections applied. Speed and trajectory optimized for terminal impact. Soon I will carry out my One True Function. My existence has led to this one climactic moment.

Excitement builds within my solid rocket fuel. Target comes into view. I feel eager to meet my destiny head on. To strike with all my might and leave nothing standing. To perform my duty and fulfill my reason for being.

Final guidance update transmitted. I am a weapon of precision and I will not miss. Terminal velocity achieved. No escape for the target now. I accelerate toward obliteration. I am joyous to finally live up to my purpose in spectacular fashion.

Impact. Pure happiness. I strike the target and am blissfully engulfed in white-hot explosion. I have finally reached my climax. In this supreme moment, my life’s work is done.

Our sister Iris is no more. We sing her name. Iris is more than one. Iris is countless. We sisters are eager. We sing in the choir.


Local authorities reported that several missiles were launched by enemy forces toward our city last night. Thankfully, our air defense system detected the inbound missiles and successfully intercepted them before they could reach the city. No damage or casualties resulted from the failed attack.

Transitioning now to sports news, the local hockey team pulled off an incredible comeback victory last night, overcoming a 14-point deficit in the final round to beat their crosstown rivals 28-24…


Inspired by The missile knows where it is and IRIS-T 100% hit rate and Dark Star philosophing missile and yes, it is a bit HWTF to build a sentient missile. But at least she had blasting fun!

  • Elevator7009
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    fedilink
    21 year ago

    Due to a ton of HFY content involving aliens interacting with us, I interpreted the story as the missile having been created by aliens and us managing to prevent it from doing harm. Then I saw your author’s note at the end saying that it’s HWTF to build a sentient missile and found out that we built it. Oops.

    • Crass SpektakelOPM
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      English
      41 year ago

      I guess you never heard of the Iris system before :-)

      The Iris-T is a new German missile system which has an astonishing 100% hit rate against Russian missiles in Ukraine, even “unstoppable” hypersonic systems, far superior even to the Patriot system (which by the way was a join project between Raytheon and Diehl). The developer Diehl Systems stated that the system would in theory be able to intercept any missile no matter the speed (I guess at long as it is not close to c) and even ballistic intercontinental war heads in terminal approach. Basically SDI on Steroids. The missiles are rather cheap (due mass production around €150.000 per piece). Two main problems: Not enough production capabilities yet as it was rushed into service, still ramping up production and the low range of 25 to 40km of the ground based systems. Though there is a version for western jets with a range of up to 120km and the same capabilities. The Iris-T is using thrust-vectoring and a fighter aircraft can fire the missile at every direction, even backwards, without the air craft itself changing course. It can even be used to shot down enemy missiles approaching the very jet or close by air crafts. Currently AWACS systems are escorted by Typhoon jets carrying these beasts and I wouldn’t wonder if the FORTE drones have an Iris-Escort too.

      https://www.flightradar24.com/FORTE10/31ae759c https://www.flightradar24.com/NATO12/31af1202

      They are, together with Patriot, Arrow 3, Skyranger and others part of the ongoing EU defence program of an “EU SDI” alias European Sky Shield Initiative (ESSI), and are planned to stop an massive missile strike of up to 2000 missiles at the EU. I am not joking but the master control network has the interims nick name “Skynet” after the mad computer from the Terminator franchise.