From what I’ve heard in all my experiences with folks woth BPD, all y’all in the cluster B have a ton in common internally, just different means of dealing with it. Apparently AvPD is cluster C, so nevermind that bit

And good on ya for working on it so hard and consistently. While the results do matter, the only thing we should judge people on is whether or not they make a sincere effort, and it sounds like you are.