I find it so hard to find anyone compatible. I’m basically slowing down my dating efforts because it just makes me miserable. Are there any success stories out there? Common personality types that pair surprisingly well? Anything?

  • 𝒍𝒆𝒎𝒂𝒏𝒏English
    7•1 year ago

    What kind of things have you found to be sticking points?

    If they’ve generally been the same sticking points across many potential partners, here’s my 2¢:

    • Principles - IMO I find that us neurodivergents can be really principled, it may help to try and seek someone who shares the same strong values as you for whatever it is that matters the most to you

    • Something continually drawing you to a particular personality type, you could try and meet people in unusual situations or different environments/contexts instead to try and shake things up. If you’re using an app, scrap your current profile and make a brand new one, hopefully that should give you a more varied choice of potential partners IMO

    Some people are skeptical of personality tests and personality traits (I’m not, having witnessed most of these traits and their quirks firsthand). You could try taking a personality test to figure out what kind of people you’ll get along with really well, helping you on your way to finding a partner.

    • @[email protected]OPEnglish
      4•1 year ago

      I think my primary sticking point is it feels like I’m searching for a needle in a haystack. There are just so very few women that interest me in a sea of - for me - uninteresting women. Nothing against picnics, Netflix, and coffee in the morning, but it’s not for me. My problem on the apps is boring profiles. My problem in real life is feeling bored and/or lonely in their company. And when I finally find someone I like, it turns out the feeling isn’t mutual.

      Edit: Another problem is I am pretty judgemental (shocker, I know). I try not to be mean about it, but there does seem to be an expectation of just constant possitivity towards your partner that I find really weird.