• rynzcycle
    link
    fedilink
    46
    edit-2
    1 year ago

    During wheat harvest, Reuben went out into the fields and found some mandrake plants, which he brought to his mother Leah. Rachel said to Leah, “Please give me some of your son’s mandrakes.”
    -Gen 30:14

    Umm… what the hell do I do? What’s a mandrake?!

    Random Verse Generator, who’s next?

    ETA: I googled

    The alkaloids make the plant, in particular the root and leaves, poisonous, via anticholinergic, hallucinogenic, and hypnotic effects.

    Yeah, I’m goin’ to jail.

    • AWildMimicAppears
      link
      fedilink
      151 year ago

      Acts 16:3

      Paul wanted to take him along on the journey, so he circumcised him because of the Jews who lived in that area, for they all knew that his father was a Greek.

      oof, jail it is.

    • @Thepinyaroma
      link
      121 year ago

      Exodus 35:3 Passage: “Do not light a fire in any of your dwellings on the Sabbath day.”

      Well, not jail at least.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      81 year ago

      I got Acts 13:10

      “You are a child of the devil and an enemy of everything that is right! You are full of all kinds of deceit and trickery. Will you never stop perverting the right ways of the Lord?”

      Wtf am I supposed to do with that information

    • /home/pineapplelover
      link
      fedilink
      41 year ago

      Leviticus 19:21

      Passage: The man, however, must bring a ram to the entrance to the tent of meeting for a guilt offering to the LORD.

      • @Death_Equity
        link
        21 year ago

        Sounds like you will have to apologize for problems at work that you cause with livestock.

        • @boeman
          link
          21 year ago

          It could mean you need to steal your neighbor’s truck.

          • @Death_Equity
            link
            11 year ago

            Steal the neighbor’s truck to apologize for the first thing, then say sorry to the neighbor by giving them livestock.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      41 year ago

      Psalms 80:3 Passage: Restore us, O God; make your face shine on us, that we may be saved.

      Guess I have good chances of winning

    • JackGreenEarth
      link
      fedilink
      31 year ago

      First one that’s am actual command:

      Psalms 136:3 Passage: Give thanks to the Lord of lords: His love endures forever.

    • JackGreenEarth
      link
      fedilink
      31 year ago

      Isaiah 5:22 Passage: Woe to those who are heroes at drinking wine and champions at mixing drinks.

      • @electrogamerman
        link
        61 year ago

        God in a night out: I fucking love you guys and I fucking love the bartender!

        Bible writers: Woe to those who are heroes at drinking wine and champions at mixing drinks.

    • @electrogamerman
      link
      31 year ago

      1 John 2:17

      Passage: The world and its desires pass away, but whoever does the will of God lives forever

      I live to see another day

    • @Viking_Hippie
      link
      21 year ago

      It’s genocidin’ time!

      Joshua 9:24 They answered Joshua, “Your servants were clearly told how the LORD your God had commanded his servant Moses to give you the whole land and to wipe out all its inhabitants from before you. So we feared for our lives because of you, and that is why we did this.”

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      2
      edit-2
      1 year ago
      When the waters become hard as stone, when the surface of the deep is frozen?      
      

      Ok, I’m fine till winter

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      21 year ago

      Joel 3:8 Passage: I will sell your sons and daughters to the people of Judah, and they will sell them to the Sabeans, a nation far away." The LORD has spoken."

      So I need to get some slaves and sell them I guess