>trying to make my way through Infinite Jest when all of a sudden I hear someone’s ringtone.
>“oh hi! I’m in the library… yeah I can talk”
>how dare he interrupt me during my daily Brain Gain session!
>spend 15 minutes carefully listening to his conversation, waiting for him to finish
>he finally does
>carefully observe for another 50 minutes until he finishes reading
>follow him outside the library, meet him just by the front door
>“y-you shouldn’t, uh, t-talk in the library”
>he looks at me, somewhat bewildered
>“g-give me your telephone”
>“you fukkin’ what?”
>“it’s your p-punishment… I collect them in my trophy room”
>he beats me mercilessly
>crawl back into the library
>someone checked out my book thinking it was a library copy

such is the life of a modern intellectual