Living in the U.S. here, so non-American advice may not be the best thing for me, not sure.

I am living with an undiagnosed serious illness (haven’t eaten for 45 days.) I am off work on FMLA, which is a thing businesses in the U.S. offer to their employees where you can taker time off and they will keep your job for you, but you don’t get paid. We are not exactly poor, but we are going to be surviving for at least a month on a single income. That will be hard, but we’ll make it if we cut back.

HOWEVER.

I have $1000 in medical debt, which will just keep climbing, and I also have a cousin who says that he can get me into the best hospital in New York- I’m in Indiana and we’re not exactly at the forefront of medicine- to get thoroughly tested. I cannot afford either of these things. We do not have temporary disability insurance.

I have a lot of friends and relatives who might donate, but I feel like such an asshole asking for money. Especially when my wife is working and has a decent job. I’ve done everything I can since I was 18 to make it on my own and, while I have had to take handouts in the past, it was at the ‘this or starve’ level, and my doctor hasn’t run out of tests to do on me yet, so I wouldn’t quite put it like that. And what if the money isn’t enough to go to New York and pay for all of this testing? Do I give it all back?

So should I do a GoFundMe? What do you think?

Please, please, please, please do not give me medical advice. I really really do not want medical advice from strangers on the Internet. I leave that to professionals. But I would love this bit of AITA advice.

TL;DR - Very ill, not working, in debt, possible solution in another state. Should I do a GoFundMe?

  • @[email protected]
    2•1 year ago

    Is your condition stable, slowly worsening, or critical?

    Before you do anything, talk to your doctor. They might be able to recommend a specialist in-state or closer than NY. They may even be able to work with a doctor in another hospital. If you want to go to NY, talk to the hospital directly (not through your cousin) and buy the ticket as close as possible. Unless your condition is severe and worsening, they may not be able to take you in immediately. Look at the hospital online and see if they have telemedicine services. You might be able to make an appointment through that.

    Lastly, for the incoming medical bills my advice is this:

    • See if you qualify for financial aid through the hospital.
    • Get an itemized bill and ask if there’s anything that can be reduced.
    • Get the lowest payment plan that you can. Never miss a payment. After some time you might be able to pay it off a reduced bill or it may even be forgiven.

    Edit: Also, NTA as many people have said. Best of luck, friend.

    • Flying SquidOP
      2•1 year ago

      Apart from my losing a lot of weight, which is to be expected from not eating and I’m overweight anyway, it’s stable. As far as specialists, believe me, I’ve tried. No one has an appointment open within the next three months. But the medical bill advice I really appreciate. Thank you.