Coming out is a big deal, and yes it comes with some big downsides. I do not blame anyone who wants to call attention to their trans status as little as possible. But so many of us have internalized that shame that, even for those if us who wants to celebrate, it isn’t seen as appropriate. That if we revel in our joy of self discovery, we are somehow not taking things seriously. That we are focusing too much on aesthetics and not on the (very real!) politics of simply living.
So go get those spinny skirts and spin until you are dizzy! Make a competition with yourself to fit as many things into your pockets as you can! Get those shirts with pictures of Barbies or dinosaurs or stars and wear them everywhere. Choose a weird nickname, learn to dance however you want, practice signing your new name with hearts and weird squiggles. Replay your favorite video games with characters and choices that reflect the new you and see if anything changes. Dive headfirst into a new hobby or group event that jives with your new expression.
Yes, being trans can suck. Dysphoria sucks, society sucks, and some days are worse than others. But, as someone with chronic illness as well, don’t feel that you have to give in to that pressure of being a walking topic of serious conversation. Have those conversations as needed, but the rest of the time, you deserve to thrive in your own experience.
Honestly, more celebration and fun!
Coming out is a big deal, and yes it comes with some big downsides. I do not blame anyone who wants to call attention to their trans status as little as possible. But so many of us have internalized that shame that, even for those if us who wants to celebrate, it isn’t seen as appropriate. That if we revel in our joy of self discovery, we are somehow not taking things seriously. That we are focusing too much on aesthetics and not on the (very real!) politics of simply living.
So go get those spinny skirts and spin until you are dizzy! Make a competition with yourself to fit as many things into your pockets as you can! Get those shirts with pictures of Barbies or dinosaurs or stars and wear them everywhere. Choose a weird nickname, learn to dance however you want, practice signing your new name with hearts and weird squiggles. Replay your favorite video games with characters and choices that reflect the new you and see if anything changes. Dive headfirst into a new hobby or group event that jives with your new expression.
Yes, being trans can suck. Dysphoria sucks, society sucks, and some days are worse than others. But, as someone with chronic illness as well, don’t feel that you have to give in to that pressure of being a walking topic of serious conversation. Have those conversations as needed, but the rest of the time, you deserve to thrive in your own experience.