Basically for most of my adult life I’ve struggled to have a life that I truly wanted. Not comparing myself to anyone else, but going from job that let me go to job that let me go. Not making ends meet. I never felt “normal.” I always felt like an anomaly.

Then the pandemic hit; while everyone else was panicking and not sure what to do for me it was–at worst–a mild inconvenience; and at the time I was working a retail job (at last feeling like I wasn’t going to get fired at the drop of a hat, which was a weird feeling). I was tech freelancing on the side, too, which is where my skill set was.

Then suddenly freelancing took off (I think it was because of the freelancing sites I was on “rotated” me to the top). I was able to quit my job, do freelancing full time. I was able to go on actual dates (since I want to get married). I moved out of my parents place. It was awesome. For once I felt “normal.” Again, while everyone was panicking I felt like I was finally going in the direction I had planned, with ease.

Then when everything was going back to “normal,” I started to lose the success that I had gained. The clients that I worked for during the pandemic didn’t seem interested in continuing working. I’ve since had to fight every day to get back to what my normal was (which was everyone else’s unusual season).

Anyone else feel this? Pre and post pandemic was chaotic, and the pandemic for me felt like I was finally getting somewhere in life. I realize a lot of folks died because of COVID (and many more families split because of it), but it just angers me whenever people talk about the “new normal” when there wasn’t a “normal” for me to begin with.