This looks like something from poland. “winda” means an elevator, which explains “up machine”.

“Something is no yes” is a word by word translation of “coś jest nie tak” which means “something is not tight”. It probably is a mistake some people make when speaking english but now used more as a joke together with “thank you from the mountain”, another ridiculous word by word translation of “z góry dziękuję” which means “thank you in advance”.