how will we know if your opinion counts unless we can discount you being a white male boomer

I feel the same way. Society was becoming much more accepting of individual differences, and although there was a long way to go the idea that your choices and self-expression should not be limited by sex/gender/sexuality etc. was becoming widespread.

What has been happening over the past few years feels instead like a few more boxes have been created but society as a whole is doubling down on shoving people into them. It’s an improvement on only having two boxes, but it is a long way from not having to be in a box at all. Basic things like “pink for girls, blue for boys” was starting to fade, now it is back stronger than ever, combined with an obsession on gendering before a baby is even born (“gender reveal” party, anyone?)

I’ve found it’s a really hard topic to discuss though, because people tend to take what I say as being prejudice, as if criticising the idea of the box is criticising the people we see as belonging in it. That also combines with an idea that only people within a community are considered allowed to criticise it - hence the need for you to add “as a gay person” to your comment. So you end up with a situation where only people who accept the confines of a box and fit themselves within it are allowed to have an opinion on it, anyone who is critical of that idea is dismissed as a prejudiced outsider.