“If congress will go that far,” he says, fully knowing they won’t.

I hate the Republican tactic of proposing an absolutely batshit crazy idea, knowing it’ll never happen and therefore they don’t have any real sort of plan to make it happen, and savaging their opponents for not supporting them in doing things they do not, in fact, want to do.

I should run for president on a platform of, “If elected, I will make every American immortal and also able to fly … Provided that congress is willing to make it happen.”