I also became aware that I’m more than likely autistic this year as well thanks to, of all things, the YouTube algorithm. I had a few ADHD folks I would watch, but then I got some AuDHD stuff popup and I really found myself suddenly going “Holy shit! I’m not just weird!” and really checking boxes. I took a bunch of the tests (I know not official, but they are also free NOT $$$$) and I tested in the “probably” category on all of them.
The best was I think the first video about Autism I watched was by a guy that has both ADHD and Autism and had a female guest to talk about signs of Autism in females. Anyway I was like “yep” to so many of the signs (even though I’m male) that it started me actually diving into my journey of self discovery, and suddenly making sense of so much of my childhood, and now adulthood. It’s kinda a wild ride.
I also went down the path of taking online tests, and they pretty much all said I was probably autistic. One in particular used terms that expressed certainty lol. Still, I had been misdiagnosed in the past with another mental health condition, so I shopped around and found an autism assessment that I could afford and felt confident in. Even though the assessment by a psychologist that is an expert on autism, 2 psychologist friends, and a separate therapist confirmed it, I still had some doubts that slowly went away. I still have the doubts here and there, but I feel comfortable with the identity. Being “non-autistic” my whole life, to then suddenly find out I’m autistic, has been a hard process to accept. It’s not that I don’t want to be autistic. It’s more that I’m learning I’m something new that I never considered in the past. Basically, it’s a major identity change that I guess takes its time to settle.
Yes, the adjustment is … bumpy. I have crazy imposter syndrome, along with reflection of “what if” instances about my past had I known. Congrats on your diagnosis though!
I also became aware that I’m more than likely autistic this year as well thanks to, of all things, the YouTube algorithm. I had a few ADHD folks I would watch, but then I got some AuDHD stuff popup and I really found myself suddenly going “Holy shit! I’m not just weird!” and really checking boxes. I took a bunch of the tests (I know not official, but they are also free NOT $$$$) and I tested in the “probably” category on all of them.
The best was I think the first video about Autism I watched was by a guy that has both ADHD and Autism and had a female guest to talk about signs of Autism in females. Anyway I was like “yep” to so many of the signs (even though I’m male) that it started me actually diving into my journey of self discovery, and suddenly making sense of so much of my childhood, and now adulthood. It’s kinda a wild ride.
Congrats! Welcome to the club 🙂
I also went down the path of taking online tests, and they pretty much all said I was probably autistic. One in particular used terms that expressed certainty lol. Still, I had been misdiagnosed in the past with another mental health condition, so I shopped around and found an autism assessment that I could afford and felt confident in. Even though the assessment by a psychologist that is an expert on autism, 2 psychologist friends, and a separate therapist confirmed it, I still had some doubts that slowly went away. I still have the doubts here and there, but I feel comfortable with the identity. Being “non-autistic” my whole life, to then suddenly find out I’m autistic, has been a hard process to accept. It’s not that I don’t want to be autistic. It’s more that I’m learning I’m something new that I never considered in the past. Basically, it’s a major identity change that I guess takes its time to settle.
Yes, the adjustment is … bumpy. I have crazy imposter syndrome, along with reflection of “what if” instances about my past had I known. Congrats on your diagnosis though!