Having a rough morning fellas. The lil’one has been up since 6 and to be frank, won’t stop. The eldest is finally at school but even that was a nightmare.
So in this brief moment of respite I thought this might be a handy way of relieving a little stress; a pressure valve if you will.
Finish the sentence:
‘I love my kids but…’
*This is a safe space. Feel free to vent
my wife had a rough end of the day yesterday. it was mostly a nice day with our daughter (turning 4 in may) while i was at work, then out of nowhere she got hit with “i dont love you” while they were transitioning between activities. no conflict or anything.
while trying to talk it out, my daughter started saying that my wife hit her in the face and pushed her in the pool on our trip to puerto vallarta in october which is completely untrue (besides me there were four other in-laws around us at all times during the trip so there wouldve been drama if that did happen). my wife broke down because she didnt know how to handle that (what if she decided to say that in front of a teacher?).
then she just dropped it. she didnt seem remorseful, and she also didnt even say i love you to her. so when i get home, almost like rubbing it in, she starts singing a song about how she loves me. this and the fact that i was diagnosed with adhd as a kid makes me feel guilty for making my wifes job way more difficult.
this is all compounded by my wife raising her voice at my daughter a couple of times recently. she has always been the kind of kid who pushes boundaries to the max, who always grabs things without asking, whose reaction to school pickup and ending a day at the park is to run away and make us chase her. the incidents of my wife raising her voice were when my daughter decided to run while she was on a busy avenue, because despite drilling it into her head every time we get to a crosswalk, we dont trust that she wont impulsively ignore what shes supposed to do. since then she has ssid a few times she didnt want mommy to be with us for breskfast, which she and i make together every morning, “because what if she gets mad?”
really sorry for the rant and a half here, but its been that kind of day. so, i love my daughter, but i really wish she could just learn to chill out.
A kid with ADHD is harder than I thought possible. I was not ready for how good of a person I needed to become to make this work. Even my own parents are in awe of how patient I am, but it’s never enough.
its a weird thing to talk about, because so many times i tried to confide in other parents, and every single time i just get “oh it sounds like a normal toddler” no matter how much contextualizing i could try. youre the first person who is not my wife whose heard the story and hasnt had that reaction, so thank you.
Same page. What did the trick for one of my parents was to have them over for a few weeks and let them manage the kiddo on their own a few times. That’s when they changed their tune and started to admit it’s not nothing.