It was difficult whenever I crossed paths with racist Jordanians. Most Jordanians I’ve met were perfectly fine people, but most of those who were racist towards me were Jordanian. One problem that drives the division is demographic in nature: many Palestinians settled in Amman, the capital, and many Jordanians owned land far from the capital and lived in rural areas, hence had worse services and the government cared less about them, coupled with bad corruption within governmental circles in cities other than the capital. This always drives a disdain for the “immigrant” population, which meant Palestinians up until the Iraq war and then the war in Syria. Most problems would be related to employment, Jordanians (and often Palestinians) being hired out of favoritism and nepotism has caused pain to many people, but has also allowed some people to navigate a grossly unfair and uncaring system.

I remember at my elementary/middle school, we were not allowed to wear the Palestinian Kuffiyeh (my grandfather always told me to never wear it… only he wore one as an older man but knew that it comes with getting shit from some random people on the street so he never wanted his granddaughters to experience that). There’s also another issue that has plagued my aunt and her husband: she’s married to a Palestinian from Gaza, and could never get citizenship, so her children had a more difficult life in terms of getting education and opportunities.

Among my generation (born in the 90’s), there’s certainly less racism, and there are many Jordanians who call Palestinians their brothers and care about the Palestinian cause. But I still grew up hearing slurs like “baljikeyye / Belgian” to refer to Palestinian refugees who had tents made in Belgium. Often when I get stopped by police and my Jordanian bff is with us in the car, things go fine. Otherwise, I’m usually fucked unless the police officer is a decent person. Things move easier if you’re Jordanian with a Jordanian name, and some Jordanians/Palestinians don’t like to marry someone not from their own country/identity but that stuff has started to fade with the internet and rise in civil rights and freedoms.

I guess my experience is mixed, but I feel that’s normal when you look at a nuanced and highly porous society like that in Jordan.