Maybe explain, as you’re doing so well here, that your goal isn’t to be invalidating. You could point out that sometimes distracting, venting, or leaning on coping mechanisms can actually become the problem. They can become a way to avoid and minimize our own feelings, abilities, and issues. Even basic actions, like taking a much-needed shower, taking a brief walk or finally making it through a whole workday can trigger massive chemical changes in our brain when we’re in a crappy place.

I hope this helps. I think you’re bringing up a really helpful sticking point here, and having received and misunderstood many a “man up” pep talk during depressive episodes, I gotta say it’s a very cool move for you to workshop supportive language like this