I went to the neurologist this morning and after all of his tests, he said he couldn’t find anything neurological that could be wrong with me. He thought it might be behavioral, but that wouldn’t explain the morning heaving. He sent all of my records back to the gastro doctor and we’ll see what they say when they get back to us. So I’m kind of feeling a bit deflated.

Meanwhile, my mother is driving me insane to the point that I had a minor breakdown in the car while she was yelling at me. I had to repeat over and over that she needed to be quiet and she kept saying things like, “you have so many rules!” Finally, I said, '“these are the code words. If you hear me say the exact sentence, ‘you are making me anxious’ she had to be quiet and count to 30 in her head.” She agreed. Angrily. She doesn’t find that reasonable.

She’s also quite hard of hearing despite having hearing aids, so I’m having my wife sit in during these evaluations via Facetime so I can tell my mother “the doctor didn’t say that” and have someone else agree. It still hasn’t worked 100% of the time, but it has worked.

Also, every single time there is a possible diagnosis or she reads something that she thinks sounds like my symptoms (and she’s always wrong about that), she decides that’s definitely what I have and she definitely knows what should be done about it.

This time it’s worse, because she was a psychotherapist and she actually knows a little about behavioral therapy. But I feel really bad for her clients, because they had a totally crazy lady for a therapist. And she kept some of them on for like a decade after she officially retired. They came to her house. So they actually liked whatever she did for them. All I can think is that she has a completely different personality as a therapist.

Oh, she also thinks that the dry heaving every morning is inconsequential and I should just accept that I’m going to have to live with it the rest of my life. What. The. Fuck?

I guess it’s been so long since I’ve spent more than a few hours with her that I forgot how truly nuts she is. And a bit on the narcissistic side.

Edit: Ugh. This fucking guy again.

  • Admiral Patrick
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    138 months ago

    Man, that sucks. Saw your update the other day and was happy to hear you at least had a tentative diagnosis and some progress. Is the gross mouthwash stuff still helping at least?

    • Flying SquidOP
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      118 months ago

      I haven’t tried it since last night. I haven’t been able to bring myself to do so today. I need to find some psychologically good place to be in before I try again.

      • Admiral Patrick
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        58 months ago

        Makes sense. Your update post paints a very clear (and stressful) picture. lol.

        Rooting for you.

        • Flying SquidOP
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          68 months ago

          The real issue is I have no idea who else I could have come up here with. It was just too impractical for my wife and daughter to both come even though my daughter is in online school. So it’s crazy mom or me by myself and I don’t know that I want to be here alone either.

          • ALQ
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            28 months ago

            I’m so sorry to hear this update and I also feel for you on the overbearing mom situation. Would it be possible for you to occasionally take your wife and daughter, even if not for every visit? Or a friend who might be able to come (at least on the drive, and you could still facetime your wife during the appointment) every now and then? That might help ease your stress with your mom if she’s not there for every appointment, and goodness knows you don’t need more stress.

            Sending lots of positive vibes your way. I hope things start looking up for you.

            • Flying SquidOP
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              38 months ago

              Thanks. I’m hoping this will be the only visit, but I will definitely look into that possibility if it has to happen again. Or maybe see if I can find a friend with a lot of time off. I don’t know. I do know that I can take the train if I drive an hour to the Amtrak station in Illinois and then take a shuttle from a small Minnesota town to Rochester and even have a private car for two people round-trip for around $450. Even coach is around $350. Definitely doing that next time. The 8 1/2 hour drive was way too long.