Let’s write an episode of Frasier, one line at a time! Turns out performance and a Harvard degree aren’t mutually exclusive.

Rules to start:

1. We’ll add 1 new line each day
2. Top comment will get added to the scene!
3. Lines can include: a. A spoken line by a character (or perhaps a short exchange between a few characters to speed things up) b. A stage direction c. Relevant scene details

The next line will be decided Friday, July 7 at 8:00pm EST.

After a surprise snowstorm, Seattle is snowed in! Niles has separated from Maris and is spending some time at his brother’s apartment for company. He and Frasier are in the kitchen, Martin and Eddie are watching TV, and Daphne is doing a puzzle at the table.

There is a knock at the door…

Martin “Daphne, would you mind getting that?”

Daphne “Hold on, hold on. I’ve just about put the London Bridge back together.”

Daphne places another piece of her puzzle then scurries to answer door

Lilith, damp from the snow, enters. Frasier and Niles emerge from the kitchen

Frasier “Lilith! What are you doing here?"

Niles “Well this explains the cold front.”

Audience laughs

Lilith “As much as I’d like to return with a clever quip back to you Niles, I’m here on serious business. Frasier, it’s about our son.”

Fraiser “Freddy? Has he been hurt? Oh, I knew that sending him to Sonnet Camp over Christmas break was asking for trouble!”

Lilith “No, Frasier. This problem is much worse. Fredrick insists that he is not going to college.”

Martin “Well, nothing wrong with that. I never went to college, and look how I turned out.”

Fraiser Frantically “Sherry, Niles?!”

Frasier Nervously pouring drinks for Lilith, himself, and a visibly devastated, nearly catatonic Niles “Dear god, but Frederick has always had academic aspirations. Remember when he was six years old and he wanted to dress as Archimedes for Halloween? What on earth could he possibly wish to pursue now?”

Lilith “He wants to be a rapper.”

Niles Visibly confused “He wants to work at the mall?”

Frasier “Not a gift wrapper, Niles.”

Martin “You mean like that MC Hammer guy?”

Lilith “Precisely.”

Niles “I wonder what Freddy’s pseudonym would be? MC Escher, perhaps.”

Daphne “Well I think it’s wonderful! A sensitive young artist exploring his talents. More of our young people could stand to bring a bit of art into this world.”

Lilith “He says you inspired him, Frasier, with your career in show business.”

Frasier Outraged “Show business?! I am not some vaudeville performer! I am a doctor! I went to medical school!”