It’s so weird how Lemmy feels like old reddit and that was when I was more active but as reddit grew I began to lurk more except in four different communities. It’s still hard to not lurk here. I frequently will type a comment or make a post and delete it, haha. Anybody else experiencing this?

  • Conman_Signor
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    191 year ago

    Yeah but you just gotta do it. Post that comment or post. We gotta build this community for us. I have a tendency to not be as social able on social media vs IRL. Mainly because I’ll second guess myself. But we gotta keep this place alive

  • CharlesReed
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    141 year ago

    My lurking comes from mostly not being able to articulate exactly what I want to say sometimes. Like yeah, I know how this random thread makes me feel and I have an idea of what I want to say, but when I try to put it into actual, tangible words that make sense, I just end up sitting there for ten or fifteen minutes trying to word it out before I give up and move on lol. I’m trying to be better at it though, like force myself to post or comment something sometimes. Surely the more times I do, the better I’ll be at it right?? ¯\(ツ)

    • youthinkyouknowme
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      51 year ago

      Same here. Sometimes I want to be concise and end up with a whole paragraph trying to convey something.

        • Nepenthe
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          1 year ago

          I do the exact same thing, but it typically doesn’t stop me. Just makes me take half an hour and multiple edits on everything I’ve ever said. I’m well aware that I ramble. As long as paragraphs are separated, that’s what y’all are gonna get, voluntarily hanging out on a text-based forum. Very few people have whined, and if they want twitter-length messages, there are now several twitter-likes for them to join.

          The real worst part is typing up a message to contradict or ask for clarification on something I don’t understand, and then in carefully typing it, I end up explaining it to myself and I no longer need to ask. Never mind, then.

  • @[email protected]
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    1 year ago

    I constantly do the ‘type it out and delete’ move, both on Reddit and slightly getting there here. I’m just an anxious sort who’s thinking ‘surely no one wants to read this’ ¯\(ツ)

    • @RippleEffect
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      61 year ago

      Or that they’ll vehemently reject what you say instead of helpfully explaining their perspective and why you might be wrong. That’s always fun.

    • @Ejh3k
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      21 year ago

      I’ll have a big thing typed out and then think about if anyone would care. Usually I didn’t think anyone would. So many discarded drafts.

  • @Assassin4
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    101 year ago

    Yes keep deleting before I post. Happens quite a lot actually

    • @Alkider
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      21 year ago

      And on mobile, the bad gateway errors deleting what you jot down doesn’t help either lol

  • @Bananakabooom
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    101 year ago

    Yeah, I have significant lurker tendencies. It will take me a while to break out of the habit I think

  • @[email protected]
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    61 year ago

    I am commenting more but I will never find it easy to post. Way too much emotional commitment for me.

  • I never understood lurking. How can you just sit back and observe without ever engaging? Do you have no thoughts? Are you embarrassed? Lazy? We will never know because once the lurkers answer, they are no longer lurking. 😌

    • @[email protected]
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      61 year ago

      As someone who usually lurks on most forums, it’s a combination of not really being completely comfortable with the culture and group dynamics of smaller communities, and also just never feel compelled to add something. Usually I just see someone else has said something pretty close to what I was thinking and I just shrug and say “eh, close enough” and move on.

    • @like100dollars
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      1 year ago

      I’m gonna be honest with you, I dislike the attitude of “I never understood sth” followed by confrontational and accusational language. Maybe you did not intend to be hostile, but you’re much less likely to get a straight answer with that tone. You’re much more likely to trigger “I know, right!?” responses by people already sharing your opinion/impression.

      Seems like you already made up your mind about lurkers apparently. Let me tell you why I mostly lurk. I guess this applies to others as well.

      • Just because people don’t engage on social media does not mean they don’t engage in other parts of life.
      • Engaging takes effort, time and energy. Many people don’t have those to spare.
      • Contributions are also is not guaranteed to get positive feedback. Discussions with people holding different opinions is difficult for some people (various reasons). Open hostility is also a possibility.
      • Some (I guess most) people are not here to have discussions at all, just to consume. They are not primarily looking for a community, but entertainment or news. They have other priorities / more important things to do.

      Maybe you actually were interested in an honest answer. Here it is.

    • @androidbear04
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      41 year ago

      Im often socially awkward around people I don’t know well, and I have had many failed attempts to get past it. After a while I usually participate more.

    • @mvirts
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      1 year ago

      I lurked after neverrrr getting any activity on posts and comments. I only had like one marginally successful post on reddit

    • Obinice
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      31 year ago

      I hate myself and I’m pretty sure others will too if I let them get to know me.

    • Uranium 🟩
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      21 year ago

      I mean, I’m seeing your name in literally every feed I click on, so that’s some dedication!

      I’m certainly just lazy, and often people have said what I am wanting to say more effectively than I can

  • @Etterra
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    61 year ago

    I mostly lurk unless I think of something to say that’s interesting, additive, it funny. There’s no point in replying to a post if you have nothing at all to say - that’s just meaningless filler. That’s extra true for OC posts.

  • @c0c0c0
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    61 year ago

    Given its much smaller user base, it’s a lot more likely that a human will see your post before it scrolls off of page 1 on Lemmy. There’s a little less futility to posting

  • @falathren
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    61 year ago

    yep, first comment after being on Lemmy for 3 weeks

  • @[email protected]
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    51 year ago

    Even just a that’s looks nice because of the way it is helps. No need to over think it and have to be deep. Any activity helps grow communities.

  • CFinley97
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    41 year ago

    I used to lurk on reddit but have been much more active here.

    Basically if I’m on kbin, I try to comment or post if I have a reason

    • @mvirts
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      51 year ago

      I’ve made an effort to just post the random crap that I think of because heck, we need activity

  • @slaeg
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    41 year ago

    Yup. I pretty much only lurked on Reddit, Twitter and all those techbro sites. But trying to engage and become more active since defederating (is that even a word?).