What’s new?

What’s fucking new is I just polished off three family-sized portions of my world-famous ravioli, that’s what’s new.

And let me tell you, those delicious little pockets of pasta perfection put every other food on this goddamn planet to shame.

But enough about my culinary conquests - I don’t have all day to sit here chatting with every random asshole who decides to grace me with their presence.

I’m Governor Chris MOTHER FUCKIN’ Christopher Christie, in case you forgot.

I’ve got important shit to do, like figuring out how to fix this fucked up country one ravioli at a time.